"i cant understand why he would want to travel around with a bunch of fat, complaining , babies who are either complaining about waking up too early OR waking up too late, complaining about sleeping in places that are too cheap or sleeping in a place that is too expensive, "when are we going to stop for luuuuunch??" complaining about it being too hot or complaining about it being too cold, complaining about it being too dry or too wet or not going because there is no chase truck or what if we miss our flight or Teddy lost his passport , "i need to reeeeeessst" ..AND what if jesus fucking christ takes a super fat daddy shit all over everything and we have to have a cumbaya panic party at the embassy after pressing the SOS button on hey-joe's Spot unit because his heart stint malfunctioned ? no thanks ... im not going to hang-a-fang on that stack of monkey eggs . onward to the beer, honey and anti-social problems."
Sounds like you need a new choice of riding buddies.