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Old 04-02-2013, 05:20 PM   #174
Jick Magger
Exile on Main Street
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Joined: Feb 2011
Location: Okanagan Valley BC, Canada/Scottsdale, Arizona
Oddometer: 887
Originally Posted by porkandcorn View Post
monday, april 1, 2013

if portions of my recent posts seem a bit negative, i apologize. it reflects a generalized malaise that i've been struggling with for the last week or two. i'm not really certain what is going on, or when or where this began.

a close friend suggested that i am being too hard on myself - expecting too much out of this journey. i'm certain that's true. it's in my nature to expect too much of myself. yet, there is so much time, money, and mental/physical effort invested into this adventure, that i get frustrated when i'm not having an epic, memorable, or blog-worthy time. i know that's ridiculous, unrealistic, and unfair to myself.

now, having left the patio at the hostel in lima, i'm realizing how much i was enjoying that down time - and frankly the company and conversation in english with others who understand the travel fatigue that i'm clearly experiencing. i've been bordering on depressed since leaving that place - back out on the road to face the constant barrage of the unknown. i know that i am extremely lucky to be doing what i'm doing, but it doesn't feel that way to me right now. i'm tempted by thoughts of my bed, my city, my friends - and the ease of the familiar. the same familiar that, prior to leaving for this trip, tormented me in a similar manner.

there is a veil of grey pulled over the peruvian andes, and it's not the cloud-cover. this is such a beautiful location, but i can't see what's right in front of me. i know this is a normal part of the emotional journey. i just thought that i had already been through these feelings earlier on. i wasn't expecting to feel this way now.
Hey Fritz

Thanks for posting your story and photos. I am enjoying following along with you on your journey. The loneliness you feel on occasion is to be expected. It's great that you are relaying the real story. The highs and the lows. Keep your spirits up as there are many more highs to come. If you have the chance, grab yourself a couple of beers and watch a few of this fellow travellers, short videos from the road. He is experiencing the same lows at times. Travel safe and enjoy.
"Blessed are the Cheesemakers"

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