take off the seat.
pull a hot lead off the battery and route it over the frame, between the frame and the seat. then bash it with a smooth rock until it shorts out against the frame.
put the seat back on,,spill some fuel,,OMG there's a short,,, anna spark,,,ANNA FIRE!,
,and now you claim the insurance and get a new bike,,hope the insurance also covers the fire crew that comes to rescue you and extinguish the small blaze yer bike caused ,,all because you didn't carry some epoxy putty!
Or,,you could just unfold your entrenching tool,,dig an appropriate sized grave, shoot yer bike in both legs, and bury it in the hole ya dug!
In th olderned days,,they didn't even bother to bury horses when they quit the rider on a sidehill! Shoot 'em and leave 'em!,
But,,But,,!,Now I gotta carry all this shit?!