Why are most men so emasculated?

[dan-c]

Originally Posted by Shoganai

I do 90% of all the house work.





Yes and my bikes as well.





I wash 100% of all the cothes in our home.





Yes, and that include ALL servicing, maintinence and farkeling.





Yes, and weed-eating, fertilizing, liming and landscaping.





Yes, change or plug.





Yes, including building cabinets, refinishing furniture, painting, pressure washing, deck building, fence building, pipe fitting, PVC piping, floor refinishing and other stuff.





Yes, and how to do it safely. And know how to treat giardia in the field.






No. I have one suit and one pair of dress shoes.





No.





Yes. I love 8-10 shot Venti's so KMA.





Yes. However all my socks and undwear are white.





Never. I don't wear a belt.





I don't watch TV more than ~ 5 hours a week.
Lifetime and Spike both suck. Don't watch either.





Never. Goodwill or Salvation Army.









FWIW, if you think ANY of your questions have anything to do with being a man and not just a two legged sack for carring bits of XY to the grave,then I would say you may need to be the one following your instructions.



.

[jbhawley]

Originally Posted by Shoganai

FWIW, if you think ANY of your questions have anything to do with being a man and not just a two legged sack for carring bits of XY to the grave,then I would say you may need to be the one following your instructions..

Instructions? what instructions.
Hmmm.They look like simple questions to me.

Looks like I hit a nerve somewhere...............if the shoe fits, put it on.

[windmill]

Originally Posted by jbhawley

Rather than why are so men emasculated, lets look at what makes a man manly.
.

This is getting funny.

Getting in touch with your feminine side to show how secure you are in your masculinity.

Does a real man hang his "manhood checklist" on the refrigerator?

[jdfog2]

This thread is many things

- funny in places
- true as heck in places
- sad in places
- and just plain wrong in a few places

Some guys seem to be worried about "showing everyone I'm a man, dammit!"

That's almost as bad as the wimps that left their spouses override them on everything.

After 27 years of (not always perfect) marriage my wife and I had a discussion about me getting a motorcycle. Although she strongly disagreed with the idea she KNEW for sure I had biker DNA when we got married (had a few bikes then and for a few years after we got married). We are both smart enough to not try to control each other with ultimatums or 'you will nots."

I have put over 7,000 miles on my new bike since I bought it in April. She's a lot happier after my 100 mile / day commute was done most of the summer at over 50 mpg vs my 30 mpg car/

Why did I NOT have one for a large number of years in between ?
Simple, I was in the military and got either moved overseas or deployed too much to want to mess with it. And when I was home, I wanted to spend time with my wife and kids...not my motorcycle.

And - many men today ARE emasculated !

J

[glasswave]

Originally Posted by betasigscoot

Is it for financial reasons or b/c the wife doesn't think it's safe? Maybe it's difficult too justify the extra debt if they're already 10's of thousands in debt because of a new truck & boat.

WTF are people doing 10's of thousands in debt because of a new truck & boat??? Why would someone ever assume more debt to get a moto (w/the exception of some poor Indian family for which it'd make a major difference in quality of life/financial opportunity)?

You should never let your mortgage exceed 25% of your take home pay and should not consider any major frivolous purchases before you have at least 4 to 6 months living expenses in the bank.

As soon as you start living a month or two from bankruptcy, those asshole have you right where they want you, no wonder this country is so fucked up.

[glasswave]

Originally Posted by DAKEZ

Take that to the CS&M in the basement. It is not allowed or welcome up here.

The Jo momma argument could be made for this whole thread. I am surprized you didn't make the same reply to Rob. G. But yeah, you are probably right, even tho' I didn't start it. This whole forum has become much too JM'ed over time & I should not contribute to the degeneration. Moto technique is only a side note here anymore.

[Grinnin]

A.
There ARE controlling womens and spineless men (and vice-versa). A neighbor who wanted a motorcycle was living with a woman who wouldn't even let him listen to the radio. Motorcycle was WAY out of the question. If he had stayed he'd fit the title of this thread, but he didn't. He is now married to another woman who lets him be himself and he is spending his time building their house (so still no motorcycle, but the motivation is different).

B.
The lists of what it means to be a man are really funny. My dad is disappointed in me for a lot of reasons including:

1. I ride a motorcycle.
2. I don't ride a Harley (which is pretty odd considering #1 in this list).
3. I sit up straight in the car with 2 hands on the wheel (as opposed to one wrist draped over the wheel).
4. My boxers and boxer-briefs aren't tighty-whities.
5. . . . .

I could go on, but I think the pattern is that when a person knows the ONE RIGHT WAY to do things it becomes easier to denigrate other ways. The pattern applies to subjects that have NOTHING to do with being a man.

Most of us have moral and ethical reasoning and if we pay attention we can do what is right and still do things different from our neighbor. Or we can try to make everyone adhere to our list and call them names if they don't.

I often think that it's the insecure and cowardly guys who adhere to the "manly" ways and it takes far more courage to follow one's own conscience if that means doing things differently.

[Kommando]

Originally Posted by windmill

This is getting funny.

Getting in touch with your feminine side to show how secure you are in your masculinity.

Does a real man hang his "manhood checklist" on the refrigerator?

I keep my daily copy tucked safely inside my man-bag.

[Mambo Dave]

Originally Posted by Grinnin

A.

B.
The lists of what it means to be a man are really funny. My dad is disappointed in me for a lot of reasons including:

1. I ride a motorcycle.
2. I don't ride a Harley (which is pretty odd considering #1 in this list).

As sad as it is, the last time I was around my non-motorcyclist dad (he's never owned one, and can barely even ride a bicycle) and he labeled the bike I rode up to visit him on as a 'pussy' motorcycle (to his brother on the phone... I overheard the conversation) was the last time I chose to be around him, or speak with him.

I don't consider 'men' to be guys who are afraid to take chances, or afraid to live. After decades of his negative rants (this is a guy who called Fred Rogers ... yeah, Mr. Rogers for cryin' out loud... no good... although he used more derogatory terms), while labeling a motorcycle was not a huge error, it was enough for me to say 'goodbye.'

I've known good men who never owned an American bike out of the many they have owned and raced, like the father of my high school buddy who had also been a Green Beret in Vietnam... and here was my own father spouting off some shit and opinions for something he couldn't even do, and was scared to try, himself (i.e. ride).

I won't call myself a man for doing it, since it still makes me sick to think about it, but it seems to me that at some point real men have to look past what they were raised in, and find a way to grow to be something more. Granted, that is a biased viewpoint based on what I hope was an atypical upbringing, and while I've been told they don't exist - I still believe that there are fathers out there who make so much sense that their offspring have little to question or change.

[fz6kd7]

If you have to do something to feel manly
Then you may have issues

I was born male
I'm not changing any parts
I'll die a male

[DoWorkSon]

Before I ever got a motorcycle I was dating a girl who refused to allow me to get one. I hated it. Thus, two weeks after we broke up, I got one and never looked back.

I told the current GF(and future wife) that I will always have a motorcycle and it's my passion and I will always ride. Her answer was "good, do what makes you happy". She has never complained when I've bought one, or bought parts. She is a keeper.

My best friend sold his so he could pay for "his wife's kitchen". He sold his motorcycle, something he was passionate about, loved, and which allowed us to spend hours wrenching and being guys, because his wife wanted a new kitchen. She refuses to allow him to buy another one, and he just makes excuses why he doesn't get one. He is the sole reason I fear getting married, to be in his shoes. NEVER!

[Mambo Dave]

Originally Posted by DoWorkSon

I told the current GF(and future wife) that I will always have a motorcycle and it's my passion and I will always ride. Her answer was "good, do what makes you happy". She has never complained when I've bought one, or bought parts. She is a keeper.

1. She isn't your wife yet, or
2. you have a good life insurance policy she'd be able to afford her kitchen makeover with

[concours]

Originally Posted by Mambo Dave

As sad as it is, the last time I was around my non-motorcyclist dad (he's never owned one, and can barely even ride a bicycle) and he labeled the bike I rode up to visit him on as a 'pussy' motorcycle (to his brother on the phone... I overheard the conversation) was the last time I chose to be around him, or speak with him.

I don't consider 'men' to be guys who are afraid to take chances, or afraid to live. After decades of his negative rants (this is a guy who called Fred Rogers ... yeah, Mr. Rogers for cryin' out loud... no good... although he used more derogatory terms), while labeling a motorcycle was not a huge error, it was enough for me to say 'goodbye.'

I've known good men who never owned an American bike out of the many they have owned and raced, like the father of my high school buddy who had also been a Green Beret in Vietnam... and here was my own father spouting off some shit and opinions for something he couldn't even do, and was scared to try, himself (i.e. ride).

I won't call myself a man for doing it, since it still makes me sick to think about it, but it seems to me that at some point real men have to look past what they were raised in, and find a way to grow to be something more. Granted, that is a biased viewpoint based on what I hope was an atypical upbringing, and while I've been told they don't exist - I still believe that there are fathers out there who make so much sense that their offspring have little to question or change.

LOL, "pussy bike", must be repeating wht his village people idol buds have muttered. Asshats. A good friend mentioned a proverb "there are no 40 year old orphans" Translated, you have control of your destiny, no matter how much adversity you've encountered. Good job to NOT let your father's ignorant comments hold you back/drag you down. That being said, try to have SOME type of relationship with him, no matter how small/shallow, etc. You may/can help him grow somehow.. That's it for my unsolicited advice. Good luck brother

[Mambo Dave]

Originally Posted by concours

LOL, "pussy bike", must be repeating wht his village people idol buds have muttered. Asshats. A good friend mentioned a proverb "there are no 40 year old orphans" Translated, you have control of your destiny, no matter how much adversity you've encountered. Good job to NOT let your father's ignorant comments hold you back/drag you down. That being said, try to have SOME type of relationship with him, no matter how small/shallow, etc. You may/can help him grow somehow.. That's it for my unsolicited advice. Good luck brother

Thanks man. I've taken 'breaks' from him in the past (and he knew full well why - same negativity), and begged him to get help, and talked about it, and, really, ignored a lot of it most of my life.

In fact that 'visit' was somewhere after a good break already.

I agree with your friend's proverb, but nonetheless I don't need to be there for any more of it, and the best I can hope for is that he dwells on the loss enough that he'll at least think about what he's saying when speaking around my brother's young boys.

[baloneyskin daddy]

Are you sure he's your dad.He's mad about something!