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Old 12-31-2010, 01:48 PM   #76
slowbike smallpenis OP
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Originally Posted by Mercury264 View Post
Well done England

To win 2 test in an Ashes series, in Aus, by an innings is simply amazing - actually I wonder if that's been done before

Roll on the final test, lets get the series win.
84 series - boxing day test over in 3 days i think it was.

cangrats poms - well disciplined team on the day. if anything can be said the form on both sides has been a bit hot and cold but the poms were hot at the righ time.

asta la vista Punter - dont let the door hit you in the arse on the way out !!!!
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Old 12-31-2010, 10:36 PM   #77
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asta la vista Punter - dont let the door hit you in the arse on the way out !!!!
Is giving the Captaincy to Clarke a step in the right direction though??

His batting over the last 6 months suggests he should be heading out the same door..
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Old 01-02-2011, 01:29 AM   #78
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god no. clarke is a huge wanker. i witnessed the press conference where he was talking about himself in the third peson.

92% of australians voted against him being the next captain.

congrats to those pommy bastards for retaining the ashes. over here. and for the first time since 1986 in australia.

i will be going to the match tomorrow, sitting in the members stand directly across from "the hill" area, where the barmy army will decamp.

I also have to say thank god for them, they certainly liven up the game, the songs, the fun they have. a much better crowd than other nations.

I would be happy to see Clarke get successive ducks and Australia lose if it meant we didn't have ponting or clarke in the team anymore....
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Old 01-02-2011, 02:11 PM   #79
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As someone who doesn't really follow cricket, it would appear that the current Australian team aren't as good as previous years.

If there were alternatives available, how many of the current XI would stay in the squad based on their current level of play etc? Is it a case of, at the moment, this is the best available, and that 'best' isn't of a high enough standard in comparison to previous years.

I know that Australia have had un-replaceable players like Warne - is that the case for all positions?

Not a troll or anything, just interested
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Old 01-02-2011, 04:01 PM   #80
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My personal view is that while there's some truth in the "lack of talent" argument (but not much), the real reason is that a lot of the other cricket-playing nations and England in particular, have adopted the Aussie practices.

Australia (and not just in cricket) has made-up for its relatively small pool of talent by raising the importance of sporting success to a higher level. They've done this by and large by taking a forensic approach to training and preparation, wherever possible leaving little to skill alone.

The trouble that Australia now faces is that the rest of the cricket-playing world is catching-up with this approach.

I'm not convinced that now the rest have copied them that there's any more magic beans left in the bag for Australia.
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Old 01-02-2011, 07:14 PM   #81
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Originally Posted by A. T. T-W View Post
My personal view is that while there's some truth in the "lack of talent" argument (but not much), the real reason is that a lot of the other cricket-playing nations and England in particular, have adopted the Aussie practices.

Australia (and not just in cricket) has made-up for its relatively small pool of talent by raising the importance of sporting success to a higher level. They've done this by and large by taking a forensic approach to training and preparation, wherever possible leaving little to skill alone.

The trouble that Australia now faces is that the rest of the cricket-playing world is catching-up with this approach.

I'm not convinced that now the rest have copied them that there's any more magic beans left in the bag for Australia.
Plenty of truth in that ATTW - I also feel the limited over games have a lot to do with it - Some of the shots were just appalling from The Australian Side - to much money in the IPL perhaps?
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Old 01-05-2011, 09:45 PM   #82
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*crickets*
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Old 01-06-2011, 01:22 AM   #83
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best day evah ! ............ for the Barmy Army
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Old 01-06-2011, 06:15 PM   #84
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best day evah ! ............ for the Barmy Army
Nope. That is today, a few minutes ago.

Three-one and three wins by an innings.

Not forgetting:

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Old 01-08-2011, 03:55 PM   #85
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Billy was at school this morning and the teacher asked all the
children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical
answers came out, fireman, policeman, salesman, chippy, captain of
industry etc, but Billy was being uncharacteristically quiet
and so the teacher asked him about his father.

"My father is an exotic dancer in a gay club and takes off all his
clothes in front of other men. Sometimes if the offer is really
good, he'll go out with a man, rent a cheap hotel room and let them
sleep with him."

The teacher quickly set the other children some work and took
little Billy aside to ask him if that was really true.

"No" said Billy, "He plays cricket for Australia but I was just too
embarrassed to say."
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Old 01-09-2011, 11:56 AM   #86
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nevgriff64 View Post
Billy was at school this morning and the teacher asked all the
children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical
answers came out, fireman, policeman, salesman, chippy, captain of
industry etc, but Billy was being uncharacteristically quiet
and so the teacher asked him about his father.

"My father is an exotic dancer in a gay club and takes off all his
clothes in front of other men. Sometimes if the offer is really
good, he'll go out with a man, rent a cheap hotel room and let them
sleep with him."

The teacher quickly set the other children some work and took
little Billy aside to ask him if that was really true.

"No" said Billy, "He plays cricket for Australia but I was just too
embarrassed to say."
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Old 01-09-2011, 05:00 PM   #87
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Even better than the jokes are the ten reasons why, according to Aussie journo Will Swanton, the Poms would lose:

1 Overrated
They walked around The Oval after their dominant home summer like they were God's gifts to Wisden. Here's who they really beat. No one. Nuffies and cheats. England clean-swept the worst team on the planet, Bangladesh, and then won three out of four Tests against rotten Pakistan. Now they're portrayed as superstars.

2 Kevin Pietersen
He might be growing a moustache for a very good cause but he's still getting around looking like Dirk Diggler out of Boogie Nights. His most recent Test efforts have been the biggest joke. John Buchanan was right with his assessment of Pietersen. Buchanan was panned because the truth hurt. There's more than one 'I' in Kevin Pietersen and it hurts morale.

3 No top speedster
Jimmy Anderson, Stuart Broad and Steve Finn are respectable quicks. But they lack the fear factor. Every truly great attack has someone pushing 150km/h, like Mitchell Johnson does for Australia. None of the touring fast bowlers are frightening. Away from swing and seam-friendly England, that doesn't leave them with much.

4 Passive captain
Andrew Strauss has to lead by example because his introverted demeanour doesn't get the blood pumping too much. Only his scores do. He leads with quiet assurance when things are going well. But he comes across as introverted and submissive when things start going pear-shaped.

5 No superstars
Pietersen is as good as anyone when he's in the mood, but he hasn't been in the mood for a long time. He couldn't make a hundred against Bangladesh – his 99 was close but no cigar – and Doug Bollinger, Ben Hilfenhaus and Johnson can smell blood. Graeme Swann is the only Englishman to make a world XI right now. England are successful because they know their limitations. Which means there are limitations.

6 Over-analysis
They've faced bowling machines with footage of Australian speedsters running in at them – and still didn't want to know about Mitchell Johnson. They've given themselves three weeks in Australia to acclimatise but haven't played on pitches like the monster they'll encounter at the Gabba. Every breath they take is a part of a suffocating plan. There's no freedom, nothing instinctive or adventurous. Paralysis by over-analysis.

7 No depth
In such a cramped schedule, injuries are bound to hit both camps. England are in serious strife if they lose any of their first XI. There's a vast gulf between their top-tier players and those on the standby list. Australia can only hope and pray that off-spinner Monty Panesar is called in for Graeme Swann. Australia have eight Test-standard speedsters in the queue.

8 Chokers
This is England we're talking about. Losing is a tradition. Think soccer World Cups. Think Tim Henman at Wimbledon. Think every cricket tour of Australia since 1986-87. They always arrive talking themselves up, vowing they won't wilt under the heat and pressure and scrutiny, then wilt under the heat and pressure and scrutiny. They've hired a self-described Yips Doctor – because they need one.

9 Warm-ups
Everyone keeps rattling on about England's perfect preparation. They must be having a laugh. A few of them made runs at Adelaide Oval. It's like batting on the Hume Highway. Anyone seen the scorecards? Western Australia rolled England for 223. South Australia dismissed them for 288 on the Hume. And Australia A ripped through their top order in Hobart A yesterday. Perfectly prepared? Piffle.

10 Scars

Five of their top six batsmen are the same lot who stumbled and bumbled through the 5-0 loss on England's last trip to Australia. The scarring is deep and real. Jimmy Anderson's memories of Australia are all nightmarish. He averaged 45.16. Broad and Finn are yet to play a Test series in Australia. Hard surfaces jarring bones and muscles, oppressive heat – they won't know what or who has hit them

As late as December 22, Swanton was popping up on Fox Sports with a further 10 reasons why their victory at Perth would prompt the Aussies to slaughter the Poms, whose morale was obviously shot.

The whole thing makes for brilliant reading. England have, apparently “stirred the beast”. Their batsmen “need coaching like they’ve never needed it before”. Ricky Ponting is “in his element”. His team “has proved it deserves the unadulterated support of every single person in the country” – indeed, the sheer number and venom of the Australian fans will surely cause the English to fold like a paper hankie in Melbourne. Oh, and England’s four-man bowling unit simply isn’t up to it.


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Old 01-10-2011, 02:34 AM   #88
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Old 07-10-2013, 08:11 PM   #89
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Bump.

An interesting start...
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Old 07-11-2013, 01:48 PM   #90
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Sure sounds like an exciting first Test.
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