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Old 11-10-2005, 07:07 AM   #61
KneeDragGirl
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Joined: Oct 2005
Location: Wherever the spinning globe stops
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shoganai
That is one of the funniest things I've ever read here!!

Oh, yeah!! Welcome to the Asylum!
Does that mean that I will be wrapped up in a straight jacket and put in a padded cell?

If that's the case....be sure you play really good music!!
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Old 11-14-2005, 12:07 AM   #62
Wayne Weber
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KneeDragGirl
Does that mean that I will be wrapped up in a straight jacket and put in a padded cell?

If that's the case....be sure you play really good music!!
Naw, just wrapped in an Aerostich and put on a padded GS....iPOD optional!

I just re-read this and kehale, your list of odd bikes is as fun as the tip-overs! Tripple two stroke, rg250, 84CR500, MB5, RD350 (#107, funny!)....

I've done 12 of the 183 first biffs.

Oh, I remember more...

185. Wondering why, when coasting down ice covered concrete street, WHY does the rpm suddenly go to idle? cuz....the rear wheel is not turning. Entertained by me and the EX500 both doing many 360's sliding together down the road. On the way to work, so everyone makes fun of my slushy/ice covered clothes.

186. It's hot. I'll wear everything except.....GLOVES! Barely get the front brake on as a 100+lb black lab darts out of the owners door, and in front of me. Make note of the F250 Hiboy next to me as I T-bone the dog and the EX500 and I do a Nac Nac and I go over the bars, tumble and land on my feet. Scratched my hand. Tell the owner, no big deal the bikes already seen the pavement. Get home and realize that stench is dog shit that was squeeeeeeeeeeezzzed out of the big Lab all over my bike. No animals were harmed in this posting.

187. "trakmaster" non DOT knobby (and the worst tire made) + hot dogging around corner + painted crosswalk with oil on paint = wonderful low slide in front of college students.

188. Borrow neduro's XR650 without "exactly" asking. Low slide in front of him while demonstrating my power sliding abilities.

189. After nice weekend with wife at quaint bed and breakfast, get on KTM950 and foot slips on wet pavement. Yell at wife to "JUMP" as we high side in front of bed and breakfast. Ask wife to help pick up the pig while she's still laying on the ground, laughing. Sort of laughing. Not really.

190. Hit rock the size of a stove while single track trailriding, looking at scenery instead of trail. Smash big toe through MX boot into bloody pulp so it looked like a spoon.

More later...
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Old 11-20-2005, 10:28 AM   #63
AndyT
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#191. Loop of my shoelace blew over the gearshift lever of my 1980 Suzuki GS1000G and I couldn't get my foot down at a stop light. I know, I should have been wearing boots.
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Old 11-25-2005, 08:44 PM   #64
PackRat
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192. A friend of mine was working on his bike in his attached garage taking the fuel tank off. When the phone rang, he stuffed the fuel line back on the shut off valve (can you see where this going?). He answers the phone and grabs another beer in the same hand that is holding a screw driver and pushes the door open to return to the garage. He drops the screwdriver into what is now a 6 foot wide puddle of gas! He watches the slow-motion end-over-end flight of the screwdriver as it hits the puddle and, of course, sparks, etc. etc. etc. The two bikes didn't fall down, they melted down with half of the garage, all tools, freezer, kid's bicycles, etc.
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Old 11-26-2005, 06:09 PM   #65
ServoJockey
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193.
Bring home new to me F650. Park in driveway on sidestand. Tell (my) 5 and 7 year old boys playing in yard, "Don't touch the bike, I will give you a ride in a couple of minutes." Go in house to relieve bladder pressure. While finishing up, 7 year old comes in house and proclaims, "Daddy, the motorcycle just fell over". 5 year old is in driveway trying to pick up bike.

The rest of the story; the door to the house wasn't even closed when the 5 year old started climbing on it, from the right side. We are lucky he was not hurt when the bike fell. In retrospect, I should have told them to climb all over the bike, then they wouldn't have touched it.
Now I always put it on the center stand. And the boys don't touch it unless they ask.

This is a lot funnier when I think about it now. My 5 year old, now 9, doesn't like to talk about it.
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ServoJockey screwed with this post 11-28-2005 at 04:55 AM
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Old 11-27-2005, 08:01 PM   #66
Wayne Weber
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ServoJockey
193.
Bring home new to me F650. Park in driveway on sidestand. Tell (my) 5 and 7 year old boys playing in yard, "Don't touch the bike, I will give you a ride in a couple of minutes." Go in house to relieve bladder pressure. While finishing up, 7 year old comes in house and proclaims, "Daddy, the motorcycle just fell over". 5 year old is in driveway trying to pick up bike.

The rest of the story; the door to the house wasn't even closed when the 5 year old started climbing on it, from the right side. We are lucky he was not hurt when the bike fell. In retrospect, I should have told them to climb all over the bike, then they wouldn't have touched it.
Now I always put it on the center stand. And the boys don't touch it unless they ask.

This is a lot funnier when I think about it now. My 5 year old, now 9, doesn't like to talk about it.
HAHA I remember gingerly climbing on my dads CL175. Didn't crash it but I was scared. My 950 reminds me of that, since I can't really touch the ground on the 950 either.
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Old 11-30-2005, 01:47 PM   #67
frewhl
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194, have not dropped it yet(for this reason)

i can't believe how often the cuff of my pants(i know,i should be wearing boots)gets hung on the peg or side stand just as i am about to throw it up on the center stand.
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Then I headed over to where my girlfriend works. Greg, the boss, followed us outside and kept trying to tell me about how he went to Las Vegas one time on a motocycle. I was like, "oh-kay, that's great Greg."

Just back from Prudhoe Bay, IMO it was really worth the trip, AK is a beautiful place & you need lots of time to take it all in. I'm looking forward to returning & exploring some places i didn't have time to ride.RIP Ron Melton
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Old 12-07-2005, 08:59 PM   #68
mikeym
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195

stopped, and take both hands off your bars to readjust your balls and your bike tips and its too heavy to catch with your legs... ;)

did that one before lucky the bike was ok

~mikeym
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Old 12-16-2005, 01:29 PM   #69
Chico
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Bluhduh

Pumping up the rear tire of a 650gs with an extra long kick stand, using a hand pump and having it dominoe into the r/90 next to it and cause the r/90 to dominoe into your defenseless drum kit.
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Old 12-22-2005, 10:53 PM   #70
GS Weaver
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196
Attempt to reach the screwdriver laying on the other side of a Kawasaki Vulcan by leaning wayyyy over the seat from the left side of the bike instead of simply walking around it. Watch Vulcan tip over and smash into a ZX-11. Watch both bikes end up on the ground in a big pile. Curse. alot.
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Old 12-24-2005, 09:47 PM   #71
MotoMind
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Location: Oakland, CA
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Checking in with a 62 today...

62. Using a little too much power turning the first corner after you've put on new tyres (with that nice slippery release compound on them).
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Old 01-29-2013, 01:31 AM   #72
overlandr
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197 Whilst pulled up and sitting astride in a parking lot immediately outside a burger joint, observes a whole bunch of VIP type cars pull in to the same lot. Several VIP type dudes get out and some proceed to the the burger joint. You then notice one of them is Obama and he actually looks straight at you and waves/smiles as he walks past. In utter surprise and shock, one loses one's concentration and falls over.
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Old 01-29-2013, 02:12 AM   #73
aeneas
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These all happened in 1 week time after I just upgraded from a 125cc to a 800cc..

198. 6yo daughter sits on the motorcycle while I push it towards the garage. Take a sharp left turn and go from the sidewalk onto the street, lose balance because I don't let it lean towards me but keep it upright.. and have it slowly fall over to the right.. passed the tipping point, only thing I could do was telling her to watch out while I try to hang on so it falls gently..

199. take a left hand turn corner too fast in heavy rain, not being able to brake in time.. so decide to go straight to be able to keep braking more.. only turning at the very last moment but still hitting the curb and dropping anyway.

and a near-fall, just was able to keep it: too sleepy on my commute to work in the morning and not paying attention, took a right-hand turn into a street in 3rd gear instead of 1st.. I brake a lot to see if the adjacent bicycle path is clear, engine stalls and rearwheel locks up. Saved it by quickly grabbing cluth and keeping it in balance, was a what happened moment and woke me up..
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Old 01-29-2013, 04:21 AM   #74
PeterW
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Location: Gold Coast
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200.

Changing the rear shock on a DL 650.

A friend helps me, we use a chain hoist to tie it to the ceiling and lift it.

All works fine until the last moment, lowering it, I'm leaning over the bike to stabilize it, chain hoist slips as it's released, bike does a perfect judo throw - I mean PERFECT, dumps me on the ground and jumps up and down on me.

Pete
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Old 01-29-2013, 04:23 AM   #75
atomicalex
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Does a low speed tumble over a plastic speed bump count? As in, do not try to slowly ride diagonally over a wet plastic speed bump. The rear tyre will just spin, and you will have to get your foot down in a hurry..

I saved it, but damn was it close.
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