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Old 08-16-2012, 05:02 PM   #5296
Tuna Helper
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Benesesso View Post
, I used to weigh some of the secretaries. Was a great opportunity to look up their dresses
A lifetime ago I worked at a oil change place. We had a counter guy who would bring the women in skirts out into the shop and stand where they (the woman) would be next to the front wheel, where the pit guy could look up her dress. Never did see anything, the angle wasn't right.
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Old 08-28-2012, 04:02 PM   #5297
Mr_Gone
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Originally Posted by Mistress of the dual View Post
This explains it. I thought I was a little too short for my bike but now I see I am lacking the correct anatomy parts. Anyone know where I can obtain a set of balls?
If you have some married friends, I'm sure they have their husband's balls in a jar somewhere. They'll probably let you use them if you promise to return them to the jar when you're finished.
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Old 08-28-2012, 04:36 PM   #5298
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Apparently I asked a stupid question....

After checking into a hotel on my trip through Michigan's upper peninsula last summer, I dump my stuff in my room, shower off the road grime, and dress in clean clothes. Then I decide to go out for dinner instead of ordering pizza to the room, so I walk down to the front desk and ask the cute front desk clerk for some restaurant recommendations. (Already checked my phone: no Hooters in town, according to the Hooters app. Anyway….) After getting a couple recommendations, the clerk notices my Suzuki t-shirt. Now, I happened to be riding my Honda VFR at the time, but since I once owned a GSXR I didn’t feel traitorous. I don’t always brand-match my apparel with my bike. Sue me. I don’t own a BMW so I’m pretty sure it’s not required.
“Is that your bike out front?” she asks. [Not a stupid question. Could be anyone’s bike, and I wasn’t carrying my helmet or wearing my gear yet.]
“Yes,” I tell her.
“That’s a Suzuki?” she asks. [Not a stupid question. I had removed all logo branding from the bike. At least she knows Suzuki makes motorcycles. And she’s cute.]
“No, actually that’s a Honda Interceptor,” I say. [Notice that I said “Interceptor” instead of “VFR” because “Interceptor” sounds wicked cool to the young ladies while “VFR” sounds like some sort of boring audio component. Anyway….]
“My brother was killed on a bike fifteen years ago. Some guy didn’t see him and changed lanes and ran him off the road. I miss him every day,” she says. [A statement. Not a question.]
“I’m sorry to hear that. It makes you look for bikes when you’re driving, doesn’t it?” I ask her. [And that, folks, THAT is apparently the stupid question!!!]
Because she thinks for a few seconds, then shrugs, and says, “Not really.”
Not really?
Frack me!!!

Now, I’ve thought of about a million responses since then — some smartass responses, some dumbass responses, some noncommittal ones, a few brutal ones, one or two admonishing ones. I’ve thought of nearly everything I could of and/or should of said. But I just stood there with a remarkably stupid look on my face. Which unfortunately is not much different from my normal stupid look, apparently, according to my friends. But I was totally speechless. I literally couldn’t believe it, and the “smartass” lobe of my brain fritzed out. Shaking my head, I just muttered something vapid like “Thanks” and walked away.
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Old 08-28-2012, 05:10 PM   #5299
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I'm leaving a store the other day with a fresh keg strapped in my sidecar. A guy comes up, oogles the rig, tells me about his friend who was killed on a "crotch rocket" years ago, then proceeds to ask me some questions.

Dumbass: "Does the sidecar have a quick release?"

Me: "Well, yeah, just these four bolts and it is off. It takes me about ten minutes to drop the car."

Dumbass: "Well that's not much help, is it?"

Me: "What do you mean?"

Dumbass: "You have to have a quick release so you can drop the sidecar and lay her down if you get in a jam."

Me: "Oh yeah. Thanks for telling me. I never thought about that."

Now, this wasn't some squid with a flat billed hat. This dude was in his 40's. Glad he knew what I needed to be safe. I'm going to get right on fabricating that James Bond quick release!

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Old 08-28-2012, 05:22 PM   #5300
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RidingDonkeys View Post
I'm leaving a store the other day with a fresh keg strapped in my sidecar. A guy comes up, oogles the rig, tells me about his friend who was killed on a "crotch rocket" years ago, then proceeds to ask me some questions.

Dumbass: "Does the sidecar have a quick release?"

Me: "Well, yeah, just these four bolts and it is off. It takes me about ten minutes to drop the car."

Dumbass: "Well that's not much help, is it?"

Me: "What do you mean?"

Dumbass: "You have to have a quick release so you can drop the sidecar and lay her down if you get in a jam."

Me: "Oh yeah. Thanks for telling me. I never thought about that."

Now, this wasn't some squid with a flat billed hat. This dude was in his 40's. Glad he knew what I needed to be safe. I'm going to get right on fabricating that James Bond quick release!

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Well you never know when you'll have to lay er down to get under a tractor trailer!
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Old 08-28-2012, 05:42 PM   #5301
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Originally Posted by KX50002 View Post
Well you never know when you'll have to lay er down to get under a tractor trailer!
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Old 08-28-2012, 05:52 PM   #5302
LoneTraveler
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I get a lot of people who try to lecture me on "oh, that's so DANGEROUS! Don't you crash a lot?"

I usually tell people like this that instead of lecturing motorcyclists on safety, why don't they pay more attention and watch for motorcycles instead?
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Old 08-28-2012, 09:14 PM   #5303
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Got off work last week after it had been raining and it looked like I'd be heading into more. As I geared up a coworker comes out and as she's getting in her truck says, "terrible day to ride to work." I respond by asking why she said such a thing (with a bewildered look on my face) and she gestures towards the dark clouds. At this point I ask, "What kind of motorcycles have you been riding?" she then pretends like we didn't have that conversation and drives off. I guess she hasn't been riding much of anything.


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veriest1 screwed with this post 08-28-2012 at 09:32 PM
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Old 08-28-2012, 09:19 PM   #5304
rocker59
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Benesesso View Post
...don't know what Hamilton did.
Diesel locomotives. For a few years.

from the web:

In 1947, the firm merged with General Machinery Corporation of Hamilton, Ohio, to form Lima-Hamilton.

Lima's last steam locomotive was Nickel Plate Road No. 779, a 2-8-4 "Berkshire", which left the erecting halls in 1949. That same year Lima promoted a new wheel arrangement, the 4-8-6. This would have allowed an even larger firebox than the 4-8-4. No example of the type was built, however.

From 1949 to 1951 Lima-Hamilton produced a total of 174 Diesel Locomotives, in 6 different models.

In 1951, Lima-Hamilton merged with Baldwin Locomotive Works to form Baldwin-Lima-Hamilton (BLH). The Lima-Hamilton line of Diesels was discontinued, in favor of Baldwin's existing line. Though Lima and Baldwin had been known for high-quality steam locomotives, their line of diesel-electric locomotives was unable to compete with EMD, Alco, and GE. BLH left the locomotive business in 1956.
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Old 08-28-2012, 09:26 PM   #5305
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Originally Posted by 42 View Post
I remember playing a game when I was slightly younger, on the PS2, called Speed Kings. Really fun, had three extra challenges in the races that you could do to unlock other things (bikes, tracks, etc) . One of the unique things that I thought was batsh!t crazy was the "Power-down". You literally lay your bike on it's side, and slide underneath stuff to gain an advantage (you didn't lose speed for the first little bit).

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Old 08-28-2012, 10:59 PM   #5306
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr_Gone View Post
...“My brother was killed on a bike fifteen years ago. Some guy didn’t see him and changed lanes and ran him off the road. I miss him every day,” she says. [A statement. Not a question.]
“I’m sorry to hear that. It makes you look for bikes when you’re driving, doesn’t it?” I ask her. [And that, folks, THAT is apparently the stupid question!!!]
Because she thinks for a few seconds, then shrugs, and says, “Not really.”
Not really?
Frack me!!!

Now, I’ve thought of about a million responses since then — some smartass responses, some dumbass responses, some noncommittal ones, a few brutal ones, one or two admonishing ones. I’ve thought of nearly everything I could of and/or should of said...
I think you came very close to giving the only possible correct response under the circumstances. Unfortunately that response was correct, so you didn't.


"I'm speechless."
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Old 08-28-2012, 11:01 PM   #5307
eepeqez
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RidingDonkeys View Post
Dumbass: "You have to have a quick release so you can drop the sidecar and lay her down if you get in a jam."
I'd never encountered this concept that I should crash my motorcycle to avoid a crash until I read about it in this forum; it seems to be a uniquely American thing, just as the non riding American public seems to think that motorcycles come in not more than 3 flavours and sometimes less:
Harleys (proper motorcycles for proper Americans)
Crotchrockets (racing bikes for young hooligans)
Trail bikes (minibikes which got bigger, for playing in the woods, but never for transport)

Which makes me wonder about it's origins. (ALERT My tongue is firmly in my cheek) I wonder if it is part of the same phenomenon, that it is simply because in the eyes of the American public, motorcycles are Harleys and Harleys are prone to falling over if the rider attempts to stop or change course abruptly?
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Old 08-29-2012, 02:44 AM   #5308
Tuna Helper
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eepeqez View Post
I'd never encountered this concept that I should crash my motorcycle to avoid a crash until I read about it in this forum; it seems to be a uniquely American thing, just as the non riding American public seems to think that motorcycles come in not more than 3 flavours and sometimes less:
Harleys (proper motorcycles for proper Americans)
Crotchrockets (racing bikes for young hooligans)
Trail bikes (minibikes which got bigger, for playing in the woods, but never for transport)

Which makes me wonder about it's origins. (ALERT My tongue is firmly in my cheek) I wonder if it is part of the same phenomenon, that it is simply because in the eyes of the American public, motorcycles are Harleys and Harleys are prone to falling over if the rider attempts to stop or change course abruptly?
According to some in this forum, yes.
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Old 08-29-2012, 03:47 AM   #5309
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eepeqez View Post
I'd never encountered this concept that I should crash my motorcycle to avoid a crash until I read about it in this forum; it seems to be a uniquely American thing, just as the non riding American public seems to think that motorcycles come in not more than 3 flavours and sometimes less:
Harleys (proper motorcycles for proper Americans)
Crotchrockets (racing bikes for young hooligans)
Trail bikes (minibikes which got bigger, for playing in the woods, but never for transport)

Which makes me wonder about it's origins. (ALERT My tongue is firmly in my cheek) I wonder if it is part of the same phenomenon, that it is simply because in the eyes of the American public, motorcycles are Harleys and Harleys are prone to falling over if the rider attempts to stop or change course abruptly?
Not uniquely an American thing.... many countries have posts where the rider says "put it down" to avoid a crash. Nothing to do with Harley.
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Old 08-29-2012, 04:28 AM   #5310
Mr_Gone
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eepeqez View Post
I think you came very close to giving the only possible correct response under the circumstances. Unfortunately that response was correct, so you didn't.


"I'm speechless."
I believe you are correct, sir.
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