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View Results: I have been to the county of Fuckshire, it was ...
Nice? 29 13.74%
Nasty? 27 12.80%
Nasty but nice? 155 73.46%
Voters: 211. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 07-09-2012, 12:55 PM   #2821
planktonnn OP
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Hey up, someone's just crashed into my bike in the car park & driven off...
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Old 07-09-2012, 01:12 PM   #2822
bill42
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Originally Posted by disston View Post
Why is some of this stuff being posted in Airheads, under a title "Insert clever airhead based title here". An Escort "Sliding" thru San Francisco might be cool but it is not Airheadish. Am I missing something or somebody else is missing something?
I don't know but it appears someone just smashed poor Plankton's bike with their car, and his bike is an airhead!
Personally I come here for the bizarre but often airhead related posts. You never know what you'll find. Strangely I even found MY OWN bike posted here once, so I always gave Plank credit for having good taste after that.

It's kind of like The Hotel California... There are a lot of us who checked in once and now we can never leave...
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Old 07-09-2012, 01:28 PM   #2823
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Originally Posted by bill42 View Post
I don't know but it appears someone just smashed poor Plankton's bike with their car, and his bike is an airhead!
Personally I come here for the bizarre but often airhead related posts. You never know what you'll find. Strangely I even found MY OWN bike posted here once, so I always gave Plank credit for having good taste after that.

It's kind of like The Hotel California... There are a lot of us who checked in once and now we can never leave...
Thanks for the explanation. I did just notice this is a Plankton thread so now it makes sense.

Apparently the bike ramming was happening at the same time I was posting so maybe we'll hear more soon. I sure hope he got a tag #. Maybe he saw who it was? Is this the parking lot at work?
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Old 07-09-2012, 02:05 PM   #2824
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The car park at the "place"

We should hold an air head meet there and randomly turn cars over
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Old 07-09-2012, 02:32 PM   #2825
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Will be with y'all soon with a tale and a half, just let me grab a cup of tea & stop laughing. In the meantime, something airhead-ish


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Old 07-09-2012, 05:57 PM   #2826
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Ye tale of ye crashy smash bang - Part the first...

So then, we’re agreed, after the immodest hubris of post 2820 things just had to go rapidly wrong. And yes indeed, do rest well & truly assured they surely did almost without delay didn’t they? - When last we saw our ‘hero’ he was leaning out of the 3rd floor window here at ‘The Place’ yelling “I got your number you fucking cunt, get back here, I’ll get you, you mother fucking motherfucker” at the little white van that had just then, in broad daylight, rammed the back end of his parked DMW and knocked it forward off the side stand, smashing the headlight lens and crunching the chrome headlight surround ring & taped on CX500 fly-screen against the kerb there ahead in the parking bay. Those of you familiar with the bike in question will know that it’s pretty ratty tatty, and happily so, so there may be other damage but I’ve just not noticed it yet. And it’s for just this sort of eventuality that I maintain a scrappy ride – that and of course my much-aforementioned and frequently freely admitted outsized mechanical ineptitude. Start at post 1, you’ll get the idea

I’d been sitting at this desk here by the window and from the corner of my eye had seen the van swing in off the road and turn towards the three bays on the right: a car in the farthest, me next parked head first toward the kerb end of the bay, an empty space remaining nearest the building. Trajectory wise, all had seemed well but as he went out of the edge of my vision to my rear right quarter I heard the tell-tale bump, crunch & smash of inattentive driving, so I was straight at the open window to survey the unwelcome scene of the DMW cast way over on its side, head against the kerb. The van begin to reverse out, and I expleted the sentence shown uncensored above, which in the circumstances I thought quite restrained

I grabbed a pad & pen that were next to me & wrote down the registration number and then legged it out of the flat (locking the door on the way out, as I can’t complain of my twatty flat-share going out without locking it (twice) if I do it myself can I?) & leapt straight down three flights of stairs three flights at a time in my bare feet. I ran out into the car park to see if he’d pulled up just down the road, but he was gone, so I asked a couple of people in the car-park if they’d seen anything (one confirmed the number plate while the other lamely indicated he’d unfortunately seen nothing from behind the bushes twixt him and the event). I then went across to the apartment complex reception to get the staff there to confirm they’d got it on cctv, which they had, and so as he'd scarpered pronto I unenthusiastically asked them to call the police.

Now was the moment for some grand proactive provocative deed, so I went back outside into the horseshoe shaped complex & yelled at the very top of what was left of my voice that whoever was expecting a visit from a small white van, or knew anything about who it belonged to had better make me fully aware very fast before the shit really hit the fan. As usual nobody came out from behind their twitchy blinds, but the shouting was a simple premeditated act designed on the hoof to let whoever was concerned know I really wasn’t messing - and it seemed to work, because at this point I re-engaged the 2nd witness referred to above and as I discussed with him that I had the reg number & cctv, he, to his credit, played fair and it became clear that the van was there to see him. Or at least that he was expecting a visit from a friend in a small white van, and that it may have been him…


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Old 07-09-2012, 06:20 PM   #2827
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FYI - as was...

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Old 07-10-2012, 05:40 AM   #2828
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Gratuitous nude shot...


Mmmm, Sixxy...

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Old 07-10-2012, 07:17 AM   #2829
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Cont. from 2826

This is where the benefit of running a pre-‘broken’ bike rather than a Ducati Desmosedicci RR, or even a mid quality faired RT/RS Airhead or whatever, really pays off - as I was able to mind manage the circumstance with intuitive ease, and could converse with him quite reasonably, getting the forthcoming but initially hesitant stranger to understand that if it was indeed his friend then he should cause him to return immediately, we would sort it, and I would happily cancel the Polis. I’ve no interest in contact with them, which in my unpleasant experience has had very few demonstrable benefits whichever way I look at it, and tho/ough I’m fully legal & in possession of a complete set of the required documents etc., then we could deal with it ok ourselves, without the interference of those that we might refer to as ‘The Blue Community’. Like I said, it was easy to mind manage, especially given his fair & frank behaviour, but I should point out he also had a young boy with him (maybe 2 – 3) so it was only right to reciprocate his frankness with a reasonable response on my part. Unless I didn’t get my rightful way, in which case I might be persuaded to cease my efforts to discourage the boy, who was quite cute & likeable but seemingly unable to understand my advice to desist from bouncing around and handling the glass ensharded pavement.

At this point I will mention the ethnicity of the man before me, but you must be clear that I’ll brook no prejudice, and that the cultural background of those concerned has no relevance beyond making clear that when car-park-bloke-2 then called his friend I was unable to comprehend the contents of the conversation, as the bulk was in some unidentified Eastern European idiom, except the bits where he kept saying ‘no problem’ between segments of what I took to be his mother tongue. This may have also given more weight to the childs inability to apply my well meaning advice?

At this other point I’ll mention that I have very limited understanding of the apostrophe.

So after some small wait the van returned, and I was greeted by a huge Slavic creature, though despite his inherent bulk he managed to pull off sheepish pretty well. He also was quite frank, and admitted he panicked as he was in a works vehicle, and just ran. Of course his return was encouraged by the fact he’d been caught cold with recorded evidence, and it might be said that his nationality status may have had some influence on his return, who knows if he was insured?, maybe he was on the phone?*, but all I can say is that I’ve had less luck with getting indigenous traffic transgressors to fess up & deal, and it’s certainly true that when cars bash cars outside here, as they regularly do at ‘The Place’** the seemingly local drivers scoot. So, when all is said and done, all respect to him.

There was very little point in fuss, so we just got down to sorting it out...


* His car-park-bloke-2-friend certainly was when the event occurred.
** If it’s not that it’s the ambulances taking away the self harmers, or taxis beeping for their fares, or domestics that conclude with Big Tough Boy punching in the car window, or trying to and breaking their hand, and so we’re back to the ambulances…



The man in question, sort of...
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Old 07-10-2012, 11:41 AM   #2830
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Well, I'll just say this: well done on not visiting violence upon the van-twat. Also, I have no more airhead headlamps left in stock so you're on your own this time. Life, eh? Eh? EH??
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Old 07-10-2012, 12:15 PM   #2831
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More specific airhead related stuff:



Very rare example of the invisible airhead engine and transmission unit.
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Old 07-10-2012, 01:35 PM   #2832
Dirtyboydeadly
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if twatty van man wants to buy you a nice head light lens. I got one he can buy
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Old 07-10-2012, 01:50 PM   #2833
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Originally Posted by pjcr12 View Post
Well, I'll just say this: well done on not visiting violence upon the van-twat. Also, I have no more airhead headlamps left in stock so you're on your own this time. Life, eh? Eh? EH??
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if twatty van man wants to buy you a nice head light lens. I got one he can buy
All will be revealed Grasshoppers. A bad story, like a good shit, should never be rushed...
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Old 07-10-2012, 01:53 PM   #2834
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pjcr12 View Post
More specific airhead related stuff:



Very rare example of the invisible airhead engine and transmission unit.
What I need is a means of making things permeable at a sub-molecular level, so they can pass straight thru/ough any potential crashes
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Old 07-10-2012, 02:54 PM   #2835
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bill42 View Post
I don't know but it appears someone just smashed poor Plankton's bike with their car, and his bike is an airhead!
Personally I come here for the bizarre but often airhead related posts. You never know what you'll find. Strangely I even found MY OWN bike posted here once, so I always gave Plank credit for having good taste after that.

It's kind of like The Hotel California... There are a lot of us who checked in once and now we can never leave...


Which one's yours then?
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