Hell with work, I'm going riding; a 30,000 mile North American summer

[Two Wheeled 'Tard]

You know the worst part about the grown-up world? It's that it tricks you into never getting summer vacation again. Sometime in high school or college you'll often have the last stretch of three months or more with no obligations or responsibilities that you'll ever have, and most people will never even realize it. One day a switch gets flipped, and suddenly you're working year round. Three weeks of paid vacation a year, if you're lucky. It's a sneaky, dirty, nasty little trick.

And I reject that. I will not work year round; I will happily be homeless and poor for months on end, I will sacrifice a cushy retirement and pension for some silly decisions made in the moment.


(This is NOT the actual route; that's just the major destinations plugged into Google Maps. The actual route will be FAR more meandering and with as little slap as possible; a significant chunk with be the Trans-Canada Trail, as well as the Cassir and Top-of-the-World highway, lots of time in SoCal and the Rockies, and really riding around anywhere that strikes my fancy at the time)

I have no job, I don't have a wife or kids, I don't have a TV or a mortgage or anyplace that I can really call home.

But I do have my motorcycle, and the freedom to ride it wherever I like.

I've spent the last month working on my '08 V-Strom 650 in a friend's garage, basically throwing money at it to make it the ideal machine to sit on for the next four months. Elka 3-way rear shock, Racetech springs and emulators, GSX-R brake calipers, Happy Trails luggage, Sargent seat, crash bars, bash plate, highway pegs, and even a professional application of Line-X truck bed liner to the fairings.




(Oh god it's naked, everyone avert your eyes!)

If left to my own devices, I could have kept wrenching on this thing forever; there's such an extensive aftermarket for the Wee that I could have just kept buying more shit to bolt to it, until eventually it turned into a BMW. But I had to make a clean break and give myself a hard deadline; I was going to leave Chicago by May 2nd, no excuses.

Usually I have a moral aversion to the super-slab, but when you're just trying to get across Illinois as quickly as possible there's no better option. It's not like spending a lot of time on side roads is going to show you much different than you'd see from the interstate anyway; it's all corn and soybeans.

When I left Chicago, it was presently sunny, and reasonably warm. This was going to be a good day, I though!

I would say that I'll miss the city, but that would be a lie.

This number will get big-inated.

It wasn't an entirely perfect day to leave; I'd resolved to stay single for this summer, to not get attached and to really just travel, live for myself. But in the month I'd been back in the city, I'd met someone who made that incredibly hard. Why the hell was it so difficult to leave someone I'd only know for two weeks? I hadn't signed up expecting all of those feels. I know, lots of other fish in the sea and all, but . . . ugh. The feels.

Anyway, once I got out of the city proper and the hellish traffic, it was time to find a grocery store and load up on motorcycle road trip foods.

Taking pictures of my food is something that will be happening pretty frequently.

Only a couple hours outside of Chicago, and already it was time to put on the rain gear. The first time through it was just a shower and I was able to take it off, but eventually the sky ahead starting looking worse and I put it on again. The rain gear stayed on for the rest of the day; the farther south on I-55 I got, the worst the weather became.

Hiding under a freeway overpass, the natural home of the biker in the rain.

Seems like Iron Man is diversifying into the concrete and gravel business. (It's a nerd joke. If you don't get why this is funny, don't worry.)

I stuck to the super-slab for the whole day, making it to St Louis sometime around 7:30pm and hitting up an REI for a few basic supplies I'd forgotten. I did make an effort to find a campground, but after getting sent on a couple wild goose chases by the GPS, I said to hell with it. It was in the mid-40s with pouring rain, and well past sunset; not the ideal situation to be setting up my tent for the first time in a couple years. Knowing my luck I'd get all unpacked just to find I'd forgotten something important, and then have to pack back up with everything now wet.

So I rode back up the highway a few miles, and checked into the first hotel that I found. As much as riding around in this weather sucks, I will never tire of the stares I get as I saunter into someplace in full rain gear, looking like a drowned power ranger.

What lovely weather.

Parking lot? No thank you, I'll just leave my bike on the sidewalk under the awning.

And here I am; first night out of what's supposed to be an epic adventure, and I'm roughing it in a hotel.

Planning an adventure always sounds great on paper, but when you're in the thick of it you remember that the things that make great stories later are not much fun at the time you experience them.

[Storyteller]

Good luck Two wheeled! I look forward to reading your updates! Have fun!

[one2ride]

Two Wheel I wish I had done that when I was younger with no obligations. Now I have to wait till retirement. Good luck and remember you will always have the memory’s to draw on later when you’re stuck at work. Have fun and ride safe.

[Rutabaga]

This investment in your future is probably going to pay greater dividends than a corporation would pay for the time involved. May be the best benefit package you ever get.

[_cy_]

congrats .. hope you have many happy miles ...

[lakota]

enjoy the adventure and ride safe

[Tsotsie]

Originally Posted by lakota

enjoy the adventure and ride safe

+1

[mheitman]

Awesome!!


Look me up when you hit anywhere close to delaware, I'm on the tent space list.

[Reload270]

This looks interesting! I'm in! If you pass through Grande Prairie, Alberta on your way to Alaska I've got a free place for you to crash. Safe travels!

[PHOTON PHIL]

Looks like your going to have a grand time. Safe travels.

[camgregus]

[buckthedog]

You will never regret this trip. The biggest weapon to combat ignorance, racism, elitism etc..is travel. Not saying you have any of these, just something I was told years ago. If for some reason you lose your mind and head through south mississippi, maybe towards New Orleans, hit me up. Spare room, garage, tools..from one vstrom rider to another.

[Drif10]

Fun.

[Two Wheeled 'Tard]

Even after giving the weather a night to sort itself out, I woke up the
next morning to look at the radar and see . . . another epic band of
rain and snow. I was just south of St Louis and had to be in Austin in
two days, so I couldn't just hole up in the hotel and wait it out. So
on went the rain gear, and I kept making my way south through a giant,
nasty storm front. It was in the high 30s, low 40s if I was lucky, and
when it wasn't pouring rain it was drizzling.

This was motorcycling at it's most miserable, which I suppose isn't the worst way to start a trip. I mean, it's not like this could get any worse, could it?

Oh, dammit. Snow. Not much on the pavement, but it had piled up in various places and it was cold enough that it was sticking around.

I really need to stick to a budget on this trip, but by mid-day I was so frozen and miserable that I stopped in at a KFC for their AYCE buffet. Yes, it's crap GMO billion-calorie fast food, but I don't care. And it was only $7, which made it even tastier.

They did have some green things on the salad bar, but why would I bother when I could just eat more dead animals?

I also took advantage of their plastic bags to give my feet a bit of waterproofing. My boots are water resistant enough to light rains and sprays, but if they're getting wet for hours on end they soak through. Some nice thick dry socks, along with some plastic bags promised to keep the toes from freezing quite as badly.

I kept pushing south, and while occasionally the sky would try and look optomistic off in the distance, I was in rain for almost the entire day.

I made it as far as Fort Smith and got another hotel for the night; I was feeling really bad about blowing through this much money this quickly, but I was quite frozen and in dire need of a hot shower and warm bed. At least I saved a bit of money by using the room's ice bucket to microwave myself some chicken pasta

Or pasta with chicken-flavored goo on it.

The next day didn't dawn any nicer; yet again, 40f and raining. Once again on with all the rain gear, and I kept heading south.

I FINALLY caught a break sometime around 3pm I found the edge of the storm front, and rode out from under the storm. Within the space of less than 30 miles, it went from high-40s and raining to low 70s, and mostly sunny.

Oh god, I needed this.

I stopped off in some small town in Oklahoma (Drury? Durrant? Something like that) and stopped in at this place for some lunch.

Pork Tenderloin with what I thought was going to be a side salad. Not that I'm complaining, I'll eat almost any amount of anything that's put in front of me.

But there wasn't much else interesting that happened today; I was so glad to be out from the storm that I just super-slabbed it most of the way down to Austin, where I currently am. I'm staying with a friend here for the night, and then tomorrow heading off into Texas's Hill Country, and hopefully FINALLY getting some actual camping in. Maybe then this ride report will actually have some pictures, and might get actually interesting.

[danbrew]

This is gonna be a good one. Can't wait. Ride safe.

and, uh, ice buckets do not equal dinner plate. lol.