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Old 11-27-2011, 08:35 AM   #61
Used2BeFast2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by speedygee68 View Post
With a grimace as if I'm about to lose my puppy, I look at the 1 guy with a look of (DUDE!!! Are you going to *&&^^%ing help me or just stare at me.) As you all know when you are about to go into shock...time slows to an almost stand still....Slow slow slow motion...there goes my bike. And I ain't lettin go. (insert sound of torpedo falling) and...kerplunk.
I was up on Skinner Butte, a popular overlook in town, a few years back when 3 Pirates pulled up reving and roaring and looking "all that." When they went to stop the girl Pirate dabbed her foot on the down hill side and found nothing but air and then gravity took over. Both of the dude Pirates just sat there and watched as the bike and downed Pirate lay on their sides. Just then a guy who was parked on a older Honda Dual Sport ran over and helped up the Lady Pirate in distress! He obviously was not riding with them and had more sense of biker kinship than the other two had ever thought of.
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Old 11-28-2011, 02:38 PM   #62
Deacon66
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Migolito View Post
Caught a shoelace on the peg of a Yamaha 250 once at a Starbucks. It's simply amazing how long it takes to fall down when you know everyone is looking...
LOL... I agree, been down that road as well. Humility is a virture.
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Old 12-06-2011, 06:59 AM   #63
jerdog53
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Alright now tell them about the first time you dropped the ninefiddy..........
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Old 12-06-2011, 07:41 AM   #64
Xtremjeepn OP
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jerdog53 View Post
Alright now tell them about the first time you dropped the ninefiddy..........
That was more of a "Crossfit rep"....stop bike, swing leg off, lower bike to ground and pick back up in one smooth motion, reset kickstand.


Moral of the story is that my feet are apparently getting in my way. Can't even blame the boots since I had different sets on.. In case anyone hasn't figured this out yet, your foot and kickstand can't occupy the same spot!
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Old 12-06-2011, 10:35 AM   #65
jerdog53
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Xtremjeepn View Post
Moral of the story is that my feet are apparently getting in my way. Can't even blame the boots since I had different sets on.. In case anyone hasn't figured this out yet, your foot and kickstand can't occupy the same spot!
Well you do have some big feet...........................just sayn
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Old 12-13-2011, 09:07 AM   #66
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Used2BeFast2 View Post
I was up on Skinner Butte, a popular overlook in town, a few years back when 3 Pirates pulled up reving and roaring and looking "all that." When they went to stop the girl Pirate dabbed her foot on the down hill side and found nothing but air and then gravity took over. Both of the dude Pirates just sat there and watched as the bike and downed Pirate lay on their sides. Just then a guy who was parked on a older Honda Dual Sport ran over and helped up the Lady Pirate in distress! He obviously was not riding with them and had more sense of biker kinship than the other two had ever thought of.


They broke the biker code!!

Was one of them named Brad?
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Old 12-14-2011, 10:38 AM   #67
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Laugh

Facebook post by AltRider!


https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?f...&type=1&ref=nf
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Old 01-25-2012, 05:54 PM   #68
The_Mike
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A month after I started riding, I had an old Honda 1980 CB400T with one of those ancient law-required 85 mph speedometers.

Unfortunately, as I was coasting off the highway one morning into work, I noticed a bit of smoke coming from the left side of the bike. I pull over and discover that the smoke is due to a massive oil leak dripping onto the hot pipes. My left leg is soaked in oil, as is the rear of the bike - chain guard, rear pegs, etc. Fortunately, it did not ignite and BBQ my leg. With the thought in mind that I could nurse it home, I added enough oil to fill it back to correct (<1/2 qt), and took off. As I revved the engine to pull off, I notice an arterial jet of oil - probably three feet long - emanating from a busted base gasket. I give up and hitch a ride home. Bad day, right?

Well, I don't have a truck, so I rent a UHaul for the day to pull behind my Golf and spend most of my day angrily rescuing the bike. I'm dumb and ratchet it down way too tight, still leaning on its kickstand. Fast forward to when I get home. I'm cold, I'm tired, I've had a bad day, and to top it off, these !@#%ing ratchet straps will not come undone. I give up on the right strap and go to the low-side of the bike, where it's leaning on its kickstand, ratcheted down. I fight with the strap and FINALLY, it pops...

The 420 lb bike LAUNCHES the other direction, like it's been propelled by a catapult - which it pretty much was. I sit there for a moment in stunned silence while my brain catches up to present time. Whoops. I now have a massive tank dent to pull when I'm tearing down the motor.
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Old 01-27-2012, 01:37 AM   #69
Billtr96sn
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A few years ago I had a Suzuki VX800 ( a nice Vtwin sports tourer) and my mate had a CX500. Well, we were enjoying some Sunday morning 'sport' around some country lanes, I was leading and I came across a T junction so stopped rather rapidly, I am looking left and right to make sure it is all clear when I hear the unmistakable noise of a bile sliding down the road.
I look to my right to see a blue CX500 come sliding past on my right, then about half a second later y mate comes sliding past on my left, on his back waving cheerfully at me.

It took me 5 minutes to stop laughing.
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Old 01-28-2012, 08:44 AM   #70
Mullet Bullet
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Let's see, first was when I was riding my brothers hi era DNA 50cc bike in Spain, come to the first corner which is a roundabout and proceed to low side the dam thing brought the intersection. Still don't know what I did wrong there.

Next was a few months later on my xl185. Pulled up to a friends house and he comes out chatting with me. I forget to put the kickstand down and try to hop off like normal, only to have the bike come over with me. I stood there laughing my ass off for a minute before I picked up the bike. He finally turns around and asked why I was laughing, he missed the whole thing, I'm kind of glad he missed it too.
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Old 02-05-2012, 10:44 AM   #71
slowpoke69
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Too damned funny!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wench On Wheels View Post
Know that saying..... where there's a will, there's a way?

Come around a corner at night..... blind stop sign stupidly placed dead center arc of the curve. No cars in sight..... I go sailing through..... clutch gets stuck..... borrowed BMW I'm on stalls (really? now the thing wants to act ghetto?)..... the asphalt and my lips are about to get intimate. Poor bike is laying horizontally against a curb but I'm all proud of myself for my body somehow landing vertically on the sidewalk. Tada! Only..... I can't upright 500 pounds. 20 minutes of me shoving sweating and swearing before 2 guys in a passing car help me out.

A week later.....

Usually I back my Yamaha inside the white lines ..... it's easier to get in and out that way because of the lot's incline..... but sometimes I park aimed down at the concrete barrier. Next ride I'll walk it a few feet first..... hop on once it's nice n parallel. Never had a problem until..... kick the stand back..... muscle the bike against the slope..... thinking it's ready to mount..... dump it on its right side (up..... the..... hill..... how is that even possible?). Pissed me off. Determined this time to not be the damsel in distress I prop as much of me as can fit underneath between the pavement and the 650..... heave and..... all the way over it goes on its left side..... taking moi with it. 20 minutes of me laughing like a lunatic before 2 guys in a passing car help me out.

Occasionally..... will gets in the way.
WOW, that's funny as shit! Sounds like your last name is Murphy.

My funniest one happened coming out of my moms driveway. Dumbass me,forgot about it being dirt... AND WET! So, I start to turn left, CRAAAP, TOO MUCH GAS! The ass end breaks loose to the right, I go down. Thankfully I thought to pull my left leg out from under it before it went down, so I just sat it out until the bike hts the curb on the OPPOSITE side of Main St., pops upright, and I ride off, like nothing happened. Like I'm good or something!
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Old 02-07-2012, 07:50 AM   #72
Xtremjeepn OP
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wench On Wheels View Post
.
dump it on its right side (up..... the..... hill..... how is that even possible?). Pissed me off. Determined this time to not be the damsel in distress I prop as much of me as can fit underneath between the pavement and the 650..... heave and..... all the way over it goes on its left side..... taking moi with it. 20 minutes of me laughing like a lunatic before 2 guys in a passing car help me out.


Reminds me of one of the funniest sights I saw back in college.

This is back in the early 90s. A buddy and I only had bikes in college and were putting about 40K a year on a motorcycle, for years. Year around here in Colorado.....which means snow!

One morning after a typical college night on the town we wake up to 10-12 inches of snow. My buddy, now sober, leaves on his ZX6 only to wipe out in the driveway. (long dirt road). A couple of us are watching him out the window as he tries to pick up the ZX6 in the snow. He would get it about half way up and either the tires or his feet would slide out and down he would go. When he did finally get it up....ZIP.....down it went over to the other side with him on top of it.

By this time all six of us are gathered around the front window of the house enjoying the show.
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Old 02-07-2012, 10:12 AM   #73
dmpeach
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Ha! When I first got my new bike back in 2007, I had a pretty funny moment.

I first learned to ride on dirt bikes, then moved up to my Dad's old Yamaha Maxim 750 (650?). Needless to say, my brand new 2007 Honda CBR 600RR had a much "touchier" clutch than any bike I had previously ridden.

So I proceeded over to a friends house, where it turned out he had about 5 friends over. I rode up the driveway (gravel) and there was a small bump to get on the concrete pad next to the garage. I was going ridiculously slow in the gravel, hit the step up to the concrete and stalled it. Of course everyone was laughing, but that was not the end of it! I tried about two more times and kept stalling it (was afraid my wheel would spin in the gravel). The third try I made it, and at this point everyone was laughing hysterically. I was so embarrassed I forgot to put the kickstand down, but luckily caught the bike before it fell. A very near miss, and would have broke all the plastics on one side of that thing!
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Old 02-07-2012, 01:37 PM   #74
Wench On Wheels
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Xtremjeepn View Post
When he did finally get it up....ZIP.....down it went over to the other side with him on top of it.
I swear it's the sort of thing that happens to 75% of riders..... the other 25% are lying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xtremjeepn View Post
By this time all six of us are gathered around the front window of the house enjoying the show.
Yup..... as if you watching yourself do something ridiculous isn't bad enough..... having an audience is like suck ass squared.
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Old 02-07-2012, 02:17 PM   #75
subybaja
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A friend of mine had a big Honduh cruiser years ago...he pulled in for gas, hit a slick spot on the concrete and low-sided. He and the bike slid to a rest against the pump. He picked it up, brushed off his ass, and began filling. He told the gaping attendant "Yeah, I always park like that."

My worst would be a toss-up:

-All black ratty KLR, black kevlar, black helmet- I thought I was pretty tough-looking pulling in next to the toorist RV at a reststop. Had a smoke, began the tippie-toe dance back out of my spot, and almost fell over. I'm standing there at maximum dynamic tension, fighting to keep it up, when Herb-in-shorts-and-flip-flops walks over and gives my rack a 4" push. Back in business, nod of thanks, and zoom off. I think my face was probably glowing through the visor.

-Going to a barbecue with the local ADV crowd at a local shop. They've mostly been riding since bikes had stone wheels. I pull up on my stripped-down KLR at the end of a row of 1200GSs, KTM950s, etc. My hot girlfriend's on the back, zoning out to the vibes. () I'm not too used to riding two-up at that point, and for some reason my brain told me that she'd put her feet down?!? So I didn't. Guess what happened? As it went down, I stepped nimbly over the falling seat. She almost did, but the rack raked hard down the back of her calf. She looked at me for a second with a "WHAT THE F__K?" face, then turned and stalked into the shop. The crowd of Ironbutts smoking by the door just grinned and said "Hey...you made it!".

---tasty food---

I found out that night that she had a 14"x6" bruise down her calf, with some muscle damage that's a hard knot to this day. She didn't say a word at the time. Keeper!
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