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Old 06-10-2003, 05:17 AM   #1
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Rolla Rally Romp Ride Report

Monday, June 2, 2003

Road Notes ...
I hadn't planned on leaving for Rolla until tomorrow but now Huge Green Blobs threaten my peace of mind. A freaking HUGE low front is moving into the area, very evident on the radar screen. Even Mrs. Rider called from work and suggested I leave a day early. "Yes, dear, if you insist."
I throw together my stuff and don't leave Columbus until mid-afternoon. It's chilly and windy but at least sunny. This bizarre weather pattern continues; cooler and wetter than normal. It just doesn't feel like June either physically or mentally ...
I'm not going to do that many miles today. Get me out of Ohio and into Indiana and I'll see how it goes. First, a blast down Interstate 71 to Cincy, around the west outerbelt and into Indiana. I'm taking US Route 50 across the state and into Illinois, a suitable alternative to interstates. I'm in no hurry. Hell, I don't have to be in Rolla until Thursday, technically, although I want to get there early.
I can't find a rhythm today. I need to get my head screwed on tight here.
It starts raining near Seymour, Indiana, home of John Cougar Mellencamp. Love his songs, hate his politics. Town's uglier than I pictured it too ... more industrially ugly, less rural than I'd pictured. No mind. I'm staying for the night. If all works out right, the heavy rain will pass overnight and tomorrow I'll be thru the front ...

Tuesday, June 3, 2003

Road Notes:
This blows. It poured all night. Most of it has passed but it's colder than hell. Glad I brought my Kilaminjaro liner. The GS's heated grips are on all day long, not helped by the fact my local dealer screwed up my order for BMW handgrips. I have a secret: I carry Playtex dishwashing gloves. They keep my hands dry and the grip warmers keep 'em warm. I'll never let the ADVrider group see me in them, though. Jeebus, I'd never hear the end of it.
It never rains hard but it's constantly misting and it's freaking cold. Also another point is making itself painfully apparent: this is the worst stock seat I've ever had on a motorcycle. I guess my considerable density has smashed it into submission. Pressure points are developing everywhere so that when I shift, I gain a few precious minutes of relief but then something else hurts.
It's great to be on the road, though, even if I am cold and my arse hurts. I am heartened knowing that others are coming from further distances, and likely through worse conditions. Hey, enough bitchin'.
I'm staying in Centralia, Illinois at a mom 'n' pop motel. Despite the romantic notion that little local motels are better, I confess the surliness I'm sensing here is sort of amusing.
Tomorrow's weather looks great.

Wednesday, June 4, 2003

Road Notes:
Finally ... a gorgeous day. Still chilly but sunny and mild and almost - dare I say it - summerlike.
Today I'm finally into the ride. I can tell because I'm humming and singing in my helmet. I just know I'm good enough to win the American Idol contest. My version of Led Zeppelin's "When The Levy Breaks" would win ... easy.




I finally cross the Mississippi at Chester, Illinois. Odd little town; part charming and part frightening, because the entire place is inundated with Popeye memorabilia. Popeye's creator was born here apparently. Pretty hard to miss considering you're reminded of it every three feet.





I cross the Mississippi, a minor personal milestone.



When I'm snapping a pic of the bridge crossing Big Muddy, some highway worker warns me not to walk on the bridge.
Hey, do I look that stoopid???

Some great roads! Nice asphalt and sweepers and little traffic. Freaking glorious. Missouri Route 8 crosses the state, dumping me out onto I-44 just northeast of Rolla.
As I arrive in town, I'm turning left at a light just as another GSer is turning right. It turns out to be Randall on his graphitan GS with Jesses. After we both check in, he drops by for a visit and a beer. Hey, it's finally happening!
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Old 06-10-2003, 05:50 AM   #2
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Thursday, June 5, 2003

Road Notes:

Now it's me and Randall and Rob Z. Two GSes and a Triumph Tiger. Randall did 2,000 freaking miles to get here and Rob blasted up from Big D in Texas.
I'm wondering when the others will get here and who will show. Meanwhile, the Three Amigos head into the boonies. My Tourances are no longer virgin ... they have now kissed dirt.



Rob is an experienced dirt rider.


(Completely Unstaged Photo)

Thanks to the wonders of modern technology, (i.e., GPS) Rob got us hopelessly lost ...



We did find the Maramec Spring, which flows up to 420,000,000 gallons of water a day.
Fish was lurking in there somewhere, wishing he were with us to enjoy the fun.



Razorbak joined us too ... at least in spirit.



Later, back at the ranch, some more ADVriders roll into Rolla. Now we're joined by Krautbikeman, Pilot & Trailace.
It wasn't long at all before we were kicking tires and laughing.



Trailace has more shit on his Adventure than a big horse can carry. He's got XM Satellite Radio, and a Honda CB setup just for starters. The DVD player with Surround Sound is next, I suspect ...

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Old 06-10-2003, 06:07 AM   #3
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A few more straggled in and we rode to town for Alex's Pizza. Parked across the street, all our GSes (and one stray Tiger) must have had locals quaking in their boots. Another Hollister event on the way?

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Old 06-10-2003, 06:28 AM   #4
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Keep it coming man.

I am glad to hear that you have finally completed you last goal in life. Yes my friend! There are people here who have traveled to Mexico, South America, and Europe just to name a few, but how many have been to the birthplace of Popeye.



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Old 06-10-2003, 06:29 AM   #5
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Friday, June 6, 2003

Road Notes:
Rain.
Breakfast with The Gang at Zeno's - an excellent omelette - as everybody prepares for a morning ride. Wxwax is here now, and exactly as I pictured him: a complete gentleman, cultured, intelligent and thoughtful. So how did he end up with this group?
I got a call on my cell phone this morning from FreakingRTRider. He's on his way too, crossing the river at Hickman, KY on a ferry. Dude sounds like a hoot!
After breakfast, we're under cover from the rain in front of Zeno's when a red Guzzi Quota pulls in. Nope ... it's not Chopperman, it's Mogwai after a long ride from Wisconsin.
And what ADVrider Rally would be complete without some Potted Meat Product, eh?



And, needless to say, the ADVrider salute from Mogwai, Pilot and Trailace ...



Pilot, Krautbikeman and Waxy plotted the ride with intense fervor. Me ... I was thinkin' I'd stay around for another cup of coffee and be official Meet 'N' Greeter when more Rolla Rally attendees rolled in ...



More later ...
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Old 06-10-2003, 07:32 AM   #6
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I really enjoyed the ride this weekend too! I'm a casual quiet lurker to the site and this was my first long ride on the GS.
BMW Rider is the man, Komet, FreakinRT, Imaposer, Rogue, K12RSSteve, Rob Z, Traileze, wxwax (thanks for the t-shirt and pin) and the rest... it was great meeting you all.
I came in from Oklahoma Friday, travelled Scenic 412 and 71 (AR) up into Missouri (incredible). Broken speedometer cable and about 200 miles of rain with nothing but a smile on my face. I pull in to Zeno's to see BMW Rider with a shiny grin too! I bugged out early on Saturday to St Louis, half a day there (work) and blazed off back to Arkansas, ended up in Fayetteville (my Alma Mater) for a look at the old stompin' grounds. Then 71 down to I-40 and the superslab home, I figured about 1100 miles in all.
What a great trip and nice folks! Just a bunch of Guys hangin' around complementing each other! And the coolest bikes in town! We took the Route 66 Parade by storm too.
Here's my early morning foggy pic from Saturday, what you cant see is scattered coolers, beer and tequila bottles, broken hearts, sore butts and sore minds, still slumbering away.
You're a fine group of Gentlemen, and you may babysit my kids anytime.
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Old 06-10-2003, 07:34 AM   #7
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Oh yeah, these girls had gathered around BMWRider and would not leave him alone, I caught this picture of a young girl worshipping the ground he walked on.
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Old 06-10-2003, 07:49 AM   #8
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Quote:
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Oh yeah, these girls had gathered around BMWRider and would not leave him alone, I caught this picture of a young girl worshipping the ground he walked on.
Glad you got that pic, James, as yet further proof of my amazing magnetic personality when it comes to the ladies.
It was cool meeting you. Glad you left Lurk Mode and joined us for real.
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Old 06-10-2003, 07:49 AM   #9
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Quote:
Said jlsworks:
Oh yeah, these girls had gathered around BMWRider and would not leave him alone, I caught this picture of a young girl worshipping the ground he walked on.
Finally proof that he really does have groupies.

By the way welcome aboard! Glad to have you here, and I trust you had a proper welcome.
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If you use Geico watch out. The buyout for my car was way below any objective figure (KBB, NADA, etc.). Also, I could not get in touch with anyone on the first try during a claim resolution.

Just because it's a zoo out there doesn't mean you have to view it from a cage!

Don't be an impulse buyer... afterall you have time..
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Old 06-10-2003, 07:54 AM   #10
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Quote:
Said mogwai:
OK Rider,

Tell em how cool the Quota is......
Way cool.
Mogwai and I switched bikes and I followed him to his camping site. He'd never ridden a GS before and I'd never ridden a Guzzi.
The ergonomics were terrific on the Quota and, of course, the motor sounds and runs sweet. It's big time different from anything on the road and I respect it for that as well as the competency it displayed in the wet on unfamiliar roads. You can feel it rock 'n' roll in certain rev ranges but once you throttle up past the rough spots in the band, it smooths right out.
Glad you make it, Mog, and thanks again for the whiskey!
Dood, you rawk!
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Old 06-10-2003, 08:20 AM   #11
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Quote:
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... further proof of my amazing magnetic personality when it comes to the ladies.
And to think I errantly named this smilie the arch smilie:

But it sounds like I got it right with this one, considering all the work you did to make this rally happen: the bmwrider smilie --
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Old 06-10-2003, 08:40 AM   #12
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Said Baldy:
And to think I errantly named this smilie the arch smilie:

But it sounds like I got it right with this one, considering all the work you did to make this rally happen: the bmwrider smilie --
Oh, yeah ... I like it!
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Old 06-10-2003, 09:26 AM   #13
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I forgot to mention that Mogwai brought toothpaste ... I would need it soon to chase the dragon away that took up residence in my mouth ...



Saturday, June 7, 2003

Road Notes:

Dear Mother of God ... last night put a hurt on the body.
After the pizza, the lot of us repaired back to Zeno's and then kicked off our Oh-Fish-Ul 1st Annual BMWGSBYOB Rockin' In Rolla National Rally Romp with a party.
Luckily for us, Zeno's had a remote area where most of the crew was staying, far from prying eyes and overly-sensitive ears.

Party Central Before The Debauchery Began




But first things first ...
Most of the gang went out on the rainy Friday morning ride while I lagged behind waiting for more attendees to blow into town. Freak showed up on his RT, from which he produced some Goldschlager and Wild Turkey, so I knew we would get along just fine, thank you very much.
Word had it that the town of St. James, just up I-44, would be the starting point for a Route 66 celebration parade that would end up right in Rolla, so a few of us joined in on the fun.





We had about an hour wait prior to departure. Women swarmed around me and my bike, of course ... but I'm used to that. :lol1

Poser was there after riding straight thru from Cincy on his Duc. He was tired and hungry but did find time to share a little ADVrider warmth and cheer with us ...



My biggest concern was that the parade would roll at some ungodly slow, clutch-slipping speed for miles and miles. I needn't have worried ... we moved along quite smartly along old Route 66, the Mother Road, with locals lining the route and waving to us and cheering us on. It was quite moving, actually, a wonderful testimony to simpler times before the Eisenhower Superslab Program superceded all the old, great roads like Route 66 and Route 40 ...

Freak, showing imminently good timing and planning, managed to find a way for us to escape the clutches of the ongoing celebration in Rolla, however, as we had a dinner meeting to make with the other ADVriders at a BBQ joint in town.



We had a wait, however, which seemed as good a time as any to blow up Fish, thanks to Trailace ...



Visions of Fish guts ran through our heads ...



Finally, the BBQ place was ready to accomodate our rowdy group and we had some excellent chow.



The guy standing in the background is an intruder. He has no clue how to properly salute.



Afterwards, it was back to Party Central at Zeno's. Luckily, it was right next to my motel, the Western Inn. This was a Good Thing as the evening would be very, very fun and very, very long and I would get very, very .... funny.
Pilot produced a 50th birthday present for me, a fine bottle of Tequilla which he'd bought on-site down in Mexico on one of his journeys. We had trouble getting the top off, so knowing the bottle couldn't come back to Ohio with me without leaking, we decided to finish the whole thing that night.
Late in the evening, CroMag showed up while a few of us were still alive. He joined right in after his long commute from New Hampshire, proving once again that an ADVrider is always ready for any eventuality.
Pilot told me the next morning he saw God that night. I didn't see Him but He did talk to me and He wasn't very pleased with me ...
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Old 06-10-2003, 09:57 AM   #14
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I was one burnt puppy on Saturday but ever-so-slowly the Tequilla oozed from my system. Freak laughed at my morning appearance. So did Stevie and Rogue and Mini-Rogue and Waxy and CroMag and everybody. My eyes looked like the surface of Mars, red with weird canals running through them. Pilot was nowhere to be seen. I assumed he'd died, which would be have been a blessing for the poor lad. (His first words to me later that day were, "You son of a bitch." I plead innocence to any and all misdeeds. )

Some of the ADVrider gang did a Saturday morning ride. I wasn't up to it - ahem - so I hung around while Waxy, Freak and CroMag put together an afternoon ride.
Waxy and Freak are devious and not to be trusted at planning rides. But I was too tired to argue with them.





I started out slowly - as Sid later observed - but as the day wore on got into the rhythm of it. Freak led at a brisk pace - some would say a very brisk pace - and the cobwebs which hung over my Tequilla/beer/whiskey-addled brain were soon blown away.

We amused the locals when we stopped for a break in the middle of nowhere ...


We even got a chance to stop by an historic marker.




Freak did a great job of planning and executing the ride. We did over 200 miles of cool roads. Freak is Da Man.
That night we had a smaller, quieter, more civilized party as most of us were leaving the next morning.
Freak, Waxy and Mogwai were there as we downed some whiskey that Mog donated to the cause. (Thanks, Chuck!)




Freak, CroMag and Waxy belly up to the makeshift bar ...



Fourteen-year-old ImaPoser joined the fun as well. Just think what he can do when he finally turns legal. Only 7 more years, dood.





CroMag chatted with GSGirl while partying. Another ADVrider match made in heaven?



Despite all their trevails and problems getting to Rolla, K12RSSteve and Rogue were there.



And, finally, Pilot was there as well, albeit a bit more subdued than the night before.


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Old 06-10-2003, 10:17 AM   #15
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And, finally, Pilot was there as well, albeit a bit more subdued than the night before.


Are we having fun yet?

Must have been some party the night before!
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