A Plea For Assistance -- And A Potential Opportunity

Discussion in 'Canada' started by Canuman, Nov 18, 2012.

  1. Canuman

    Canuman Crusty & Unobliging

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Oddometer:
    4,674
    Location:
    The Palace of the People, VT
    Many of you know that the venerable Twinkie, that sign of all that is wrong with the modern diet here in the states has suffered an untimely demise. On this news, US shelves have been stripped bare of the gooey snack cake, and a US-made Twinkie is commanding a princely sum on the black market.

    Indications are that the Twinkie is still being manufactured under license in Montreal. Help your brothers and sisters across the border! The Berlin Airlift will have nothing on the Twinkie Pipeline.
    #1
  2. Drif10

    Drif10 Accredited Jackass

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2003
    Oddometer:
    46,765
    Location:
    Gates of Moscow
    We're done with being your crutch, the ones who bail your asses out all the time.

    Go home yankee, we don't want your kind around here.
    #2
  3. 250senuf

    250senuf Long timer

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2008
    Oddometer:
    2,491
    Location:
    Nelson area, Kootenai, BC, Canada
    Hey, if they want that stuff down south let them have it. It'll mean less consumption of said substance up here which will result in less strain on our health care system. Let ObamaCare deal with the consequences of Twinkie consumption.
    A chance for someone to make a buck or three: Twinkie export. :rofl
    #3
  4. Canuman

    Canuman Crusty & Unobliging

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Oddometer:
    4,674
    Location:
    The Palace of the People, VT
    Don't slap me, eh? I voted for the Canada Party this election, and I feel really bad about the whole Avro (Canada) Arrow business.

    I'm a Canadian stuck in an American body.

    I prefer Timmy's Glazed Sour Cream or the French Cruller, thanks.
    #4
  5. jasonmt

    jasonmt Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2011
    Oddometer:
    599
    Location:
    Alberta, Canada
    UPDATE: According to CTV News, the rights to Hostess brands in Canada are held by Montreal-based Saputo Inc., though the Twinkie is not currently on their roster of snacks. George Weston Ltd. owns the rights to Wonder Bread. In an interview with The Globe and Mail, Lionel Ettedgui, president of the bakery division at Saputo declined to say whether they would bring on some or all of the US snack cakes into their line-up. Hostess has announced that they intend to sell their assets, including the US brand rights for Twinkies, Ding Dongs, Ho Ho’s, Sno Balls, and Wonder Bread, to the highest bidder.


    UPDATE 2: Toronto Standard's continued investigation into the Twinkie Crisis has revealed some information that is in conflict with media reports. A 300g box of Twinkies purchased at Loblaws (Queen and Portland location) has revealed that, contrary to other reports, the golden cakes certainly look like they are part of Saputo's Hostess snack cakes lineup. The Saputo label is clearly marked on the side of the box. Attempts to reach Saputo for comment were unsuccessful. A spokesperson said there was no one at the Montreal office today to comment or answer our questions about where Twinkies made for Canadian consumption are produced or why other reports say that Twinkies are not part of the Saputo Hostess lineup. Canadians consumers will have to wait until Monday for reassurance that they will still be able to buy these beloved treats in our country.
    #5
  6. Steve G.

    Steve G. Long timer

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2004
    Oddometer:
    7,472
    Location:
    West is the Best

    We Western Cdns try to avoid any business dealings Quebecuois. Sorry, can't help.
    #6
  7. Canuman

    Canuman Crusty & Unobliging

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Oddometer:
    4,674
    Location:
    The Palace of the People, VT
    By Jingus, we appear to have unearthed a mult-national conspiracy here. It's certain that the long claws of Ottawa are reaching into our simon-pure American snack food industry. What's next? Will the all-dressed chip supplant Honey Barbecue? Will we be offered poutine at our local McDonalds? I do not like it, Sam-I-Am. We'll be forced to eat smoked meat and pay HST next, and they'll take away our guns.
    #7
  8. Canuman

    Canuman Crusty & Unobliging

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Oddometer:
    4,674
    Location:
    The Palace of the People, VT
    Montreal is no more part of Canada than New York City is part of the US. They both exist in a different reality. Most of Quebec is pretty mellow. I love the Townships. They'll send us Twinkies.

    That's a comment that will get this booted to CSM for sure. Sorry, but at at least I was here before the move.
    #8
  9. yamalama

    yamalama wet coaster

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2008
    Oddometer:
    1,351
    Location:
    left coast
    The French ones taste even better.
    Stay away.
    #9
  10. Deuce

    Deuce Crazy Canuck

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2001
    Oddometer:
    2,867
    Location:
    Vancouver Island, Bitchin' Columbia, Canada
    You'll be wanting us to smuggle in Coffee Crisp and Ketchup Chips. :1drink
    #10
  11. Canuman

    Canuman Crusty & Unobliging

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Oddometer:
    4,674
    Location:
    The Palace of the People, VT
    Naah, we can get those here. There's even a little diner that smuggles St. Hubert gravy for their poutine not too far away. I'm on the border of Orleans County, VT, aka "little Quebec." Before 9/11, no one really thought of the border as an impediment.

    We'll trade you cheap gasoline and Marlboros for Twinkies, however.
    #11
  12. frazman

    frazman Post***ern Redneck.

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2008
    Oddometer:
    1,852
    Location:
    North of 40, South of 60.
    Twinkies, meh. You haven't lived until you've had a Jos. Louis (aka Mad Dog Vachon Cake) with a Pepsi for breakfast.



    [​IMG]
    #12
  13. sturgeon

    sturgeon Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2007
    Oddometer:
    957
    Location:
    Great White North
    You guys need to step up a notch in your gourmet tastes. Butter tarts and nanaimo bars! Twinkies are for tw ... well lemme just say that even the black bears up here won't eat 'em out of the garbage, and they'll eat just about anything. Even Y&S licorice cigars with real 'fire' on the end are better. :deal
    #13
  14. Drif10

    Drif10 Accredited Jackass

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2003
    Oddometer:
    46,765
    Location:
    Gates of Moscow
    The best breakfast in Quebec. :lol3
    #14
  15. H96669

    H96669 A proud pragmatist.

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2009
    Oddometer:
    4,750
    Location:
    Hiding off Hwy 6, B.C.
    Jos Louis :clap...altough I am more of a Demi Lune type of guy, sure ate lots of them Jos Louis, fresh off the Patisseries Vachon delivery truck. That was only 30 miles or so from my home town. And then once in a while we'd drive through Sainte Marie de Beauce and stop at the Patisseries Vachon store to buy "seconds" by the box.:clap

    Wal Mart sells some of that stuff in BC....always stale.:puke1
    #15
  16. Canuman

    Canuman Crusty & Unobliging

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Oddometer:
    4,674
    Location:
    The Palace of the People, VT
    There was a patisserie in Magog called "Gaby" years ago. We'd cross the border just to visit it. The mille feuilles were worth the drive. Darn place burned to the ground.

    However, we're not discussing flavor in regards to Twinkies. I haven't eaten one since the 1970s, and frankly haven't missed them at all. They are a matter of national security. What other food will sustain us through the Zombie Apocalypse as noted previously? They require no particular special storage. There is no such thing as a "stale Twinkie." Cockroaches shy away from them. When you needed an instant burst of energy to decapitate a Zombie, though, Hostess had your back. No more.

    It's a sad age we live in, indeed.
    #16
  17. divimon2000

    divimon2000 Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Apr 16, 2011
    Oddometer:
    628
    Location:
    Lake Champlain, Vermont
    What store can I ride up to and grab a box? (just for the ride of course).
    #17
  18. sturgeon

    sturgeon Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2007
    Oddometer:
    957
    Location:
    Great White North
    I'm thinkin' just become of them, and eat brains. They're not half bad with lots of mayo and onions.
    #18
  19. Canuman

    Canuman Crusty & Unobliging

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Oddometer:
    4,674
    Location:
    The Palace of the People, VT
    High in cholesterol and leads to Mad Cow Disease. Almost as bad as Twinkies.
    #19
  20. High Country Herb

    High Country Herb Adventure Connoiseur

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2011
    Oddometer:
    10,514
    Location:
    Western Sierras
    I should have just kept my childhood memory of Twinkies.

    When I heard the news, I bought some at the corner store to share with my wife. When I bit into it, I was truly disappointed. The cake did not have that sweet, trans-fat flavor that I remember, and the frosting inside was literally the diameter of a pencil. My first thought was "no wonder they are going out of business".

    I started to go buy some Zingers, then decided to keep that memory intact...:cry
    #20