Back in July of 2012, I went on a fairly epic 12 000 kilometre ride from Toronto to Yellowknife, North West Territories. I could write a fairly comprehensive book on what not to do when motorcycle touring based on my vast first-hand experience. I consider myself a pretty smart person, but for some reason, when I get on a motorcycle, I start to get stupid. And not in a live-life-to-the-fullest, balls-to-the-walls way. It's more of a lost-all-common-sense stupid. So the title of this ride report describes all the dumb things I tend to do while touring: - I speed - I get impatient, and end up driving aggressively and passing cars when I shouldn't - I do 1000 km days (which is way too much) - I choose boring main highways in order to "make good time" - I don't stop as often as I should - I usually finish a tour with a 1000 mile last day/night - I eat like crap (usually two "meals" a day, with one being a bag of chips and a chocolate bar), and let myself get dehydrated - I feel depressed and guilty because I should actually be working, not out on a motorcycle trip goofing off All these actions result in me not having as much fun as I should. Did I still have fun on my trip? Yes, but not as much as I should have. Someday I will learn. Anyhow, now that I'm done being awkwardly honest about myself, let's get on with the ride report, shall we?