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Discussion in 'The Perfect Line and Other Riding Myths' started by cold_fire, Apr 13, 2009.
I mostly get "Oh my god! Are you OK? Someone call an ambulance!"
Okay. That was pretty damned funny.
Now that it's winter, I'm getting the same two predictable questions nearly every day:
"You're not riding today... are you?" and/or "Are you stupid?"
I'm also getting a few more general comments, rather than questions. To summarize:
"You're a complete idiot."
"I think you ate too many paint chips as a kid."
"You need to have a mental health exam."
"I think your awesome devotion to riding every day is just smoking hot." (Always said by an equally smoking hot young lady.)
Okay, I lied about that last one. Smoking hot women don't talk to me.
This morning I'm filling up. Temp around 10 F. Wind around 30. Blowing snow. Guy walks over from his 4x4 pickup says:
"Are you crazy?"
I say the only appropriate thing: "Yes." He laughs and walks back to his truck.
That, and "DON'T MOVE HIS HEAD!"
People are living on Lookout Mountain now?
I used to ride in that sort of weather, but gee, I just grew tired of it. Good you are keeping up the spirit.
I know how you feel, I went for a ride yesterday and couple times I wished I had put my lining in my jacket. It must have been in the 60s down in the valleys. Brrr!
Turns out the winds were gusting to over 50 mph. I thought it was darned windy!
On my KLR:
"What is that, some kind of big dirt bike?"
(Actually had a guy at work tell me this) "Hey, something is up with your bike, sounds like it's only running on one cylinder."
But my all time favorite was years ago, on my little Ex500. Decked out in full gear, with my long wavy hair tied up and reaching almost to the seat, a carload of little douchebags in an Integra roll up next to me and the driver rolls down his window and says "hey babe, nice bike". To which I flip the front of my modular helmet up, showing my bearded craggy and very un-female face and say "Thanks!"
"It's raining, aren't you getting WET!!!???" :eek1
I usually reply with "Yes but thankfully I'm not made of sugar."
^ oh oh, I usually tell them that I'm not that kind of "_itch".
That reminds me of one from last summer:
It's about 110 F outside, and I pull into a parking spot wearing full ATGATT, all black.
Woman getting out of an air conditioned car: "Aren't you hot?"
Me taking off my helmet: "Thanks. You're not so bad yourself."
Got a little laugh out of her. Thank goodness that's all it got out of her, or my wife would have killed me.
Ah, missed opportunities....
Are you sure all of those are because of your riding?
Or that they even happen when you're anywhere near your bike?
...and I get that last one all the time...NOT!
I follow an old retired couple onto the elevator at work and I'm in my riding gear; in my right hand is my helmet, in my left is my tank bag. The lady asks if that's a map of Hawaii on my map pouch on the tank bag.
I just got off a motorcycle, in south Mississippi, in a casino. I don't get uppity with her because I'm coming into work and I might run into these folks while on the casino floor. I kindly look at the map and show it to her and her husband and say its a map of the Mississippi river delta, you know, the end of the road from my last ride.
Man, old people need to stay home and watch TV.
One night I had met a friend at a local bar. Had my 2 drinks and was leaving. I had parked directly in front of the front door of the bar. I was just getting on the bike when 2 ladies walked out and the tall good looking brunette asked "Is that your bike?". Right then a friend of hers came out and asked her to come back in for a minute. She told me "Dont go anywhere, I'll be right back. We're going for a ride!". I still had not said one word to her. I waited about 1 minute and left. Thought it was gonna be my lucky night. Then gave it a second thought. I put on my helmet and rode off alone.
1. What type of bike was it?
2. That was an awfully quick second thought... how ugly was she?
Now that I think about it, I get those questions ALL THE TIME. Man, that's some harsh self-realization, dude. Now, I'm bummed out. I might be stupid. Or my parents fed me paint chips as a kid.
1. I ride a Road King.
2. She was actually a pretty attractive lady.