The BEST TWVT ride report EVER!!!!

Discussion in 'Ride Reports - Day Trippin'' started by NCD, Jun 12, 2012.

  1. NCD

    NCD Dirty Hairy

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Oddometer:
    634
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    Looks like it's time for another NCD Ride Report. You know the deal - lots of route information, stunning historical tidbits, and high brow humor.*

    So, thanks to intothenew and his compadres, we have a great and growing network of dirt routes to link together here in the East. I was only able to do a small part of it on a long weekend, and I've outlined the basic route I took in red below. Home to East Liverpool, OH - due south to Gauley Bridge, WV - cross state to Durbin, WV on badass non-TWVT backroads - and North for a while again on the trail before heading home. This isn't the EXACT route I took or anything, but it's as close as I could approximate and keep it looking like a wiener:

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    Sidenote: If this guy approaches you and wants to discuss hairstyling tips .... RUN. But, if he wants to talk to you about country roads in West Virginia, well then ... by all means pull up a chair and pay attention:

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    I'm putting together a theory on WV road layout and construction, so for now - take a look at this and I'll be back in a minute:

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    * This is complete bullcrap. Don't believe anything I say. For real. Bored? Read this then.
    #1
  2. NCD

    NCD Dirty Hairy

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Oddometer:
    634
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    So West Virginia sure does take it unfair share of ridicule, with all of the hillbilly humpin' your sister type jokes. But mile per square mile, I can't think of any state more populated with super curvy seldom driven roads. Of course, this is coming from an Ohio resident - whose state maps often resemble a sheet of graph paper.

    So, I did some research.

    Turns out, Ohio and West Virginia's roads were conceived and laid out by entirely different methods. After dutifully scouring the state archives, I found compelling evidence of how these 2 neighboring states came up with such different levels of motorcycling bliss:

    STATE OF OHIO ROAD DESIGN STUDIOS, circa 1952:

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    Very serious looking group, hard at work keeping things in order, and easy to navigate.

    AUTHENTIC STATE OF OHIO ROAD DESIGN KIT, unearthed near the ODOT HQ in 1973:



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    STATE OF WEST VIRGINIA DEPARTMENT OF ROADS AND MOONSHINE, circa 1948:

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    OFFICIAL STATE OF WEST VIRGINIA ROUTE LAYOUT SUPERVISOR:

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    Now it all makes sense, doesn't it? While Ohio was busy dividing up everything into squares - those drunk bastards were making routes from point to point while chasin' coon dogs thru the woods. Often in the dark. That's the only logical explanation as to why two points that are 10 miles away from each other takes 30 miles and over and hour to ride between!
    #2
  3. NCD

    NCD Dirty Hairy

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Oddometer:
    634
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    So, that explains why you want to take your bike to West Virginia as soon as possible. Miles of smiles. Heading south out of East Liverpool, it's not long until you can begin to forget about city life:

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    Grass growing in the middle of your road is always a good sign for ADV'rs:

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    Muckety muck, however, makes your 500lb piggy unhappy:

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    Now, I interpreted this sign to mean "Only those who are not well should proceed." Right?

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    A nice, long day in the saddle brings you to Cedar Creek State Park, where nice tent sites await. Showers too, ya stinky bastid! (It was in the 80's all day. PU.)

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    About 320 miles on this day, with 210 being on the TWVT. If you have any fears of blind corners on narrow roads, or big chunky gravel - they will be gone by this point!
    #3
  4. Kenm123t

    Kenm123t Adventurer

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2011
    Oddometer:
    85
    Thats not a Coon hound thats a Beagle ! Moonshiners dont drink when we're chasing coons &hounds Its dangerous you could drop your mason jar crossing a fence:freaky
    #4
  5. NCD

    NCD Dirty Hairy

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Oddometer:
    634
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    Dammit! I'm such a city idiot. I don't even know the difference between my hillbilly dogs. :rofl
    #5
    TwoWheelExplorer likes this.
  6. Kenm123t

    Kenm123t Adventurer

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2011
    Oddometer:
    85
    My dawgs live in a gated water front developement on the Treasure Coast of So Fla. Poor Belle has no coons to chase just squirrels bunnies and lizards.
    #6
  7. bemiiten

    bemiiten League of Adventures

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2003
    Oddometer:
    5,248
    Location:
    Hamilton NJ.
    :lurk
    #7
  8. ghostdncr

    ghostdncr Burnin' daylight...

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2006
    Oddometer:
    1,122
    Location:
    Louisville, KY
    This would be a coon hound, commonly referred to as a blue tick:

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    This is great. Keep it coming! :lol3
    #8
  9. intothenew

    intothenew Briar Patch Navigator

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2007
    Oddometer:
    2,141
    Location:
    Almost Heaven
    OK, nap time's over NCD. Let's get this show back on the curvy road.
    #9
  10. rhino_adv

    rhino_adv Gnarly Adventurer

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2010
    Oddometer:
    633
    Location:
    central Illinois (Bloomington)
    GREAT ride report! Looking forward to more! :lurk


    Brad
    #10
  11. charles353

    charles353 Pretentious Asshat

    Joined:
    May 25, 2011
    Oddometer:
    18
    Location:
    The Black Hills
    Subscribed :1drink
    #11
  12. NCD

    NCD Dirty Hairy

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Oddometer:
    634
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    Again, lots of credit goes to you and your crew for assembling all of this. It made a last minute decision to road trip a real blast!
    #12
  13. NCD

    NCD Dirty Hairy

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Oddometer:
    634
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    Woke up to another clear blue WV sky. Nice and cool, and looking forward to another day of squiggly lines.

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    Packed it up, chowed a Clif Bar, and headed southeast outta Cedar Creek. Wasn't long until the good stuff was back under the rubber:

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    It's strange how you come across these inexplicable freshly paved sections. Fun though to wind it up a bit:

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    Not on the 'official' route, but it sure is fun on a hot day!

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    This downhill left is steeper than it looks. Why do pictures do that?

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    It wasn't long before the Clif Bar was burned up. I searched the GPS for "food" - "on my current route" and it thought about it for a minute, and then replied: "No matches found." Shit. I was gettin real hungry. After I bit more, I took a gamble and went off route when I saw that I was running adjacent to another paved route. Sure enough, one of those itty-bitty-town-run-by-one-lady-diners was open and cookin' breakfast! ShaaaaWeeeet! this fat ass omlette was $5!!!

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    Squiggly Wiggly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    To and through Gauley Bridge:

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    Ahhhh. CR13 heading south out of Gauley Bridge. This was my favorite 10 mile stretch based on prevailing road conditions:

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    I made it as far south as the New River Gorge on the TWVT, and wandered about a bit there. Some unbeliveably steep and fun single lane roads take you down and across the New here. Worth the side trip:

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    I then busted off the TWVT and across the state on some high speed twisties. It was fun to spin it up a bit faster on the wider backroads. My final destination was the little town of Durbin - - to get there you take Back Mountain Road :evil:

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    All in all, a 275 mile day of goodness, with about 115 of TWVT. Yay for WV. Camp in Durbin next to the Greenbriar River, listening to the sweet sounds of hillbilly karaoke until 11PM. In the small parking lot of the little local restaurant. Just a table set up with a radio and mic. I wish I was kidding about that.

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    #13
  14. NCD

    NCD Dirty Hairy

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Oddometer:
    634
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    Sunday morning. The sun begins to rise in a misty valley. River burbling behind your tent. Then this bitch cranks up:

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    Oh well. You need to get up and ride anyway! Just a few miles out of Durbin, and the TWVT game is back on - headin' North!

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    The roads on this side of the route are way more open, with fewer blind corners. That + that = mo speedy!

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    Make some motorbike noises and look at this picture:

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    And then it happened. After 4 years and 25,000 miles of riding - I have my first biff at speed. On pavement, too goddammit! 30 mph through the 500th curve in the last few days with gravel in it. But this gravel/dirt was camoflagued real well into the color of the road. ATGATT, but still - that friggin' hurts. Bike lowsided in an instant:

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    My calculations put that at approximately $56.81 worth of Touratech Zega case aluminum ground into the road surface (the case took the brunt of the impact and bike sliding backwards. Two thumbs up for SW Motech crashbars. Gouged, but worked perfectly!

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    I finished up my last planned section and headed toward Elkins for gas:

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    At least I ate shit on the last bit of TWVT I had planned to ride this weekend. My goal was to ride a supremely nice twisty route the next day and half home in a big diagonal through WV and Southern Ohio. But I was getting sore and stiffening up pretty bad from the bodyslam. I think my barend sorta charlie horsed the hell out of my right bicep, and it was making the throttle difficult to control.

    So, tail between my legs, I slabbed it back home all afternoon.:cry

    But I'll be back. I only scratched the surface of the TWVT in these few days. Just like my CDR ride, I don't have the time to knock off the whole enchilada at once. Gotta pay the bills, you see. But I will get back down here soon, just you wait and see!
    #14
  15. intothenew

    intothenew Briar Patch Navigator

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2007
    Oddometer:
    2,141
    Location:
    Almost Heaven

    We'll leave the light on for ya. Thanks for sharing the report.
    #15