By Jove, a new pirate joke

Discussion in 'Australia' started by Pickled Amnesiac, Jul 29, 2006.

  1. sages

    sages Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2008
    Oddometer:
    468
    Location:
    Perth, West Australia
    They had to disguise it in case anyone saw them while they nicked it.
    SmittyBlackstone and Monkey Rum like this.
  2. Dave Ward

    Dave Ward I don't even know where the box is.

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Oddometer:
    8,685
    Location:
    King River, Western Australia
    Rainbow colour scheme?
    SmittyBlackstone and LeglessOne like this.
  3. bikeroz

    bikeroz Long timer

    Joined:
    Oct 18, 2012
    Oddometer:
    2,418
    Location:
    Sydney Lower North Shore
    Somehow I don't think downtown Vancouver is highly tolerant of beige.
  4. Creekgeek

    Creekgeek Master Finger Painter

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2012
    Oddometer:
    7,138
    Location:
    So. MD
    thanks for the giggle @bikeroz, i'd have snorted beer out my nose if I was drinking while reading.
  5. davenowherejones

    davenowherejones short old guy

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2013
    Oddometer:
    4,801
    Location:
    Hope "I get there", BC, Canada
    I used up all of the spray cans in the basement. I painted it black before I sold it.

    Volkswagen copied my paint scheme a few years later.
  6. ricksax

    ricksax Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2013
    Oddometer:
    179
    Carnac.jpg
    frizzen and pidjones like this.
  7. gsd4me

    gsd4me 90% bluff Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2005
    Oddometer:
    9,914
    Location:
    Brisbane, Australia
  8. sages

    sages Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2008
    Oddometer:
    468
    Location:
    Perth, West Australia
    Zorro's been busy again
  9. numbat

    numbat Long timer

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2007
    Oddometer:
    1,320
    Location:
    Northern Rivers NSW OZ
    SmittyBlackstone likes this.
  10. gsd4me

    gsd4me 90% bluff Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2005
    Oddometer:
    9,914
    Location:
    Brisbane, Australia
    Not if you follow 'Murcan politics.
  11. gsd4me

    gsd4me 90% bluff Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2005
    Oddometer:
    9,914
    Location:
    Brisbane, Australia
    Or the Lone Ranger. I can imagine him on the glory stroke. Hi ho, tadpoles awaaay!
    AusTMan and sages like this.
  12. richo360

    richo360 Long timer

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2011
    Oddometer:
    5,064
    Location:
    Melb Bayside
    Why would you bother? May as well watch reruns of Dumb and Dumber.
  13. ricksax

    ricksax Been here awhile

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2013
    Oddometer:
    179
    "That might be a bit cryptic on an Australian thread."

    Sorry, Mate. I always think of humor as international. I tell your OZ jokes here in the USA, although I sometimes have to change a name or too. They still get laughs. But you can look up Carnac the Magnificent on the Johnny Carson Tonight Show on Youtube, and enjoy!

    ...hands across the water, hands across the sea....
    SmittyBlackstone and numbat like this.
  14. Dave Ward

    Dave Ward I don't even know where the box is.

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Oddometer:
    8,685
    Location:
    King River, Western Australia
    Johnny Carson, one of the least funny people who thought he was hilarious.
  15. UTB

    UTB Been here awhile

    Joined:
    May 30, 2019
    Oddometer:
    110
    Location:
    Brisbane, 'stralia
    Personally it's to remind myself never to underestimate the stupidity of apparently normal people
  16. BergDonk

    BergDonk Old Enough to Know Better

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2010
    Oddometer:
    15,683
    Location:
    Snowy Mountains Oz
    A couple was invited to a fancy dress costume party. Unfortunately, the wife came down with a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone.
    He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time being spoiled by not going.
    So he took his costume and away he went.
    The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, as it was still early enough, decided to go the party.
    Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.
    She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice woman he could, and copping a little touch here and a little kiss there.
    His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new babe that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished...Naturally, (since he was her husband.)
    Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed. So off they went to one of the cars and had a quickie.
    Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behaviour.
    She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of a time he had.
    He said: "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."
    "Did you dance much ?"
    "You know, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Browning and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening.
    But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to."
  17. numbat

    numbat Long timer

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2007
    Oddometer:
    1,320
    Location:
    Northern Rivers NSW OZ
    Due to the inordinate influence they have on the rest of the globe I feel I should at least be aware of what shit show they are currently dragging us into.


    Indeed.
  18. richo360

    richo360 Long timer

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2011
    Oddometer:
    5,064
    Location:
    Melb Bayside
    You've never seen Hamish Blake huh.......
  19. a2zworks

    a2zworks Trust me, I'm Pablo

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2013
    Oddometer:
    3,825
    Location:
    West Hobart
    It’s your typical American humour, no thinking required.
    wombbatt and SmittyBlackstone like this.
  20. a2zworks

    a2zworks Trust me, I'm Pablo

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2013
    Oddometer:
    3,825
    Location:
    West Hobart
    Yeah him and his friend whatever his name is, what a pair of insipid knobs, how in hell people think they are funny and get paid by comercial outlets is beyond me.
    Well I suppose comercial outlets is for dummies, a couple of weeks ago having breakfast at Mt Dare they had one of those breakfast shows on tv, bloody hell it’s adverts every five minutes and then more adverts during the show passed on as news or stories.
    They pay people to watch with giveaways and a $10,000 cash cow price every day?
    It was that Cosch (spelling) whatever his name is, don’t know what channel.
    gavo, sages and BergDonk like this.