How to ruin your life: A Man, A Goat, and a KLR650.

Discussion in 'Ride Reports - Epic Rides' started by Wichser, Mar 12, 2019.

  1. mx813

    mx813 Been here awhile

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    So much awesomeness in this. Couldn’t help but laugh long and hard on the meth reference / lovers quarrel that my wife gave me a wtf look.
    #21
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  2. Smidty

    Smidty Been here awhile

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    :lurk
    #22
  3. Wichser

    Wichser Been here awhile

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    The goat is a story of regret and love lost.

    R6UIrWg.gif

    No, seriously, It's a sad and personal tale involving a cheap, shitty stuffed goat from Amazon that holds more value to me than all of humanity combined.

    I will get into it at some point, probably after a few too many nips from the jar of truth.

    I have no idea what the hell you are talking about.

    To the rest of you :beer welcome to the show.
    #23
  4. Wichser

    Wichser Been here awhile

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    I am swapping over to a photo host, I have pictures and the 4 per post is going to suck, maybe I'll get everything situated sometime this week. But my entire plan went to shit and instead of leaving from TN, I'll be starting in Seattle. Crazy world...

    I will leave you with this.

    As my plan didn't originally involve 2 Weeks in Florida, I ran out of socks. So I stopped by a store and grabbed some socks. As I was trying to figure out how to get the socks into my now growing pack, I found myself amused by an elderly woman making an 87 point turn into a parking space.

    I don't mean to be condescending, but this lady had absolutely no need to be driving at her age and physical condition, as was demonstrated by what immediately happened next...

    Time seemed to slow down, in the way that it does when you drop your beer or knock a glass from the counter, you know what's about to happen and all you can do is watch.

    It started with her minivan slowly bumping into and starting to deform the handicap parking sign pole. I can only assume that the shock of the gentle .000001MPH crash startled her, as she immediately floored the accelerator. While the pole and the parking curb did their best to restrain the vehicle, as she was currently in the middle of a burnout that would make any teenage hooligan proud, they had no chance.

    She slid up over the pole now it about a 15 degree angle which caused the van to come up on two wheels as it humped over the sign. It dropped down back onto all fours just as it careened into the front of the store.

    Her vehicle came to rest about 10 feet inside the store pinned up against the register stand. Still melting the tires off of the front end.

    Several people were knocked down with cuts and bruises, but no major injuries. I hung out for about 2 hours, helping where I could and giving a statement to the police as apparently I was the only one outside watching immediately before it occurred. Unfortunately it didn't occur to me to grab a picture before the wrecker pulled the vehicle out.

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    #24
  5. Rhode trip

    Rhode trip guided by voices Supporter

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    Looks like everything's gonna be 50 cents after that.
    #25
  6. RedDogAlberta

    RedDogAlberta High Plains Drifter

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    Edmonton, Alberta
    Brilliant! :clap
    #26
  7. td63

    td63 Been here awhile Supporter

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    Moscow, Idaho
    Ok, good -- I was a little afraid the KLR and goat were going to meet in an unfortunate manner, so, barring that, in!
    #27
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  8. mx813

    mx813 Been here awhile

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    Seattle huh... welcome to the PNW.

    It does rain. A lot.
    #28
    Wichser likes this.
  9. Wichser

    Wichser Been here awhile

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    tenor (4).gif

    The Seattle thing came as a surprise to me, but it's his dime and I am basically getting paid to drive and haul the bike, in addition to liquidating another one of my cars, so it's kind of a win-win.

    It also gives me a hard deadline to GTFO.
    #29
  10. Wichser

    Wichser Been here awhile

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    I'm having an issue trying to figure out what I need to do about taking a shit.

    Previously when Suburban camping, I used a rudimentary Bumper Dumper.

    [​IMG]

    It always worked far better than trying to find a log or some other appropriate place in the landscape, but with storage concerns for both the receptacle and shit as well as cleanliness I'm struggling to find something appropriate.

    Obviously I'm not a huge fan of leaving piles of shit and toilet paper across America so I want to be responsible.

    So to those reading, I ask how do you shit in the woods?

    Gratuitous Suburban picture. I preferred the front receiver on my bumper as I could nose the truck up to a good view and have something to stare at
    IMG_20190111_155514.jpg
    #30
  11. GreatWhiteNorth

    GreatWhiteNorth Long timer

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    Winterpeg - site of flatness beyond belief
    Hey! You're supposed to be happy for me :rofl

    The white Gen 2 looks pretty good tho, and is kitted out nicely. Enjoying the RR :thumbup
    #31
    Wichser likes this.
  12. Project Mayhem

    Project Mayhem Moto Aficionado Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2015
    Oddometer:
    489
    Location:
    Coal Creek Canyon, CO, USA
    Option 1:
    Rest stop & construction port-a-potties

    Option 2:
    Light weight (plastic) trowel & 2 ziplock baggies...one for TP (clean, off the roll) and one for 'soiled'
    Small package of baby/personal cleansing wipes...add to 'soiled' baggie after use
    Keychain (or slightly larger) bottle of hand sanitizer

    Option 3:
    Try (hard) to time your call o' nature with stops for fuel/food

    In the case of the port-a-potties you'll be glad for the 'cleaning products'
    If 'wild pooping'...the trowel will avoid the 'piles of shit' situation and you can burn the used TP/etc. when you stop for the night.

    :beer
    #32
  13. Wichser

    Wichser Been here awhile

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    Happy for you, trying to find a way to get into your will, it's the same thing really :imaposer

    Option 1 worked great in Osceola, my camp was about a mile from the back gate of a rest area on I-10, that was for some reason heated??? Pooping in the warmth was nice on those frigid 50°F mornings.

    Option 2 is probably the way to go for me. It actually just occurred to me that I've been using a tall .50 Cal ammo can as a chair in my shop*, I might just have to figure out a way to make that work.

    Option 3 will work in "civilization" but I don't plan on spending a whole lot of time there.

    * My "shop" being a rented storage building I probably am not allowed to work in.
    #33
  14. Dan Diego

    Dan Diego Long timer

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    I’m amazed that you were able to lay down such beautiful language, yet somehow abstained from using the term “Doohickey” even after including the obligatory “Eagle Mike Balance shaft chain tensioner kit w/gaskets.”

    Fascinating...

    Keep it coming, as I’ve yet to hear about the aforementioned goat.
    #34
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  15. Wichser

    Wichser Been here awhile

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    Spending the day working on the bike.

    Started with swapping out the bars for the ATV High Protaper. Not quite as high as I had hoped, but the pullback is better and they are about 1" wider. I will need to find some threaded inserts for the bar ends, as the barkbusters were installed into the factory threaded bar. Probably still need to grab some risers.

    [​IMG]

    Next up was the Kronos riser and dash kit. It fits ok after manipulating some of the tabs. I also added a tall Kawasaki windshield.

    The dash should be just about the right size for the Oxford grip controller, Montana 610, a mount for my phone, and a 12v/5v outlet. I'm really glad I didn't go with the klrdash kit, this works perfect for my purposes.

    Trimming the pokey bits
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    I hung some more Molle pouches.
    L-R clockwise
    Thermal liner
    Empty mag pouch that may be useless
    Front Tube
    Med/personal
    Admin pouch I'll use for maps, docs, Random cables, Pens, smokes, and what not.

    [​IMG]

    And since I was bored, I lit some shit on fire

    [​IMG]
    #35
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  16. Wichser

    Wichser Been here awhile

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    Scroll up a little and look for the flashing goat anus :kat

    I've seen a couple of people looking for help with their doohickey, slightly timid to attempt it without assistance and guidance. But this is one of the timing chain systems I'm used to dealing with.

    [​IMG]

    I'm pretty sure this Audi V8 has more components in its timing chain system than an entire KLR engine. No point in being scared.
    #36
  17. GreatWhiteNorth

    GreatWhiteNorth Long timer

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    It's only intimidating the first time. If you were/are a car mechanic, it'll be easy peasy for you. Superdoo/Tom has probably the best on-line KLR tutorials out there:

    <iframe width="784" height="441" src="" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>
    #37
  18. mx813

    mx813 Been here awhile

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    #38
    Wichser likes this.
  19. 'Bob'

    'Bob' Been here awhile

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    Nov 11, 2015
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    Newfoundland
    In! :lurk
    #39
  20. BikePilot

    BikePilot Long timer

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    Golden CO
    I'm looking forward to the next installment! Nice style sir.
    #40