Screw it! I'm gonna ROOST and sleep in the dirt!

Discussion in 'Ride Reports - Day Trippin'' started by Joe Motocross, Sep 27, 2020.

  1. dano619

    dano619 Long timer Supporter

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    There is alot of comedy goin on around here.....and it is gettin pretty deep ^^^^^ .....Joes gonna have to get a chair just for some elevation to get outta the.....yup!!
    Ginger Beard and Joe Motocross like this.
  2. Sparrowhawk

    Sparrowhawk Long timer Supporter

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    Forgive me Father for I have sinned. It's been like forever since my last confession. I get great pleasure from roosting my fossil powered motorcycle. I derive pleasure from spewing heat absorbing gassed into the atmosphere, melting ice bergs, drying out the Oregon forests, killing polar bears, and generally being a buzz kill for all those that enjoy sliding on frozen water crystals in the mountains during the dark winter months. However, I am a faithful keeper of all Kentucky spirits. Even though its relatively small 500 cc displacement provides 50 miles of roost nirvana per gallon of fossilized old growth forest, it is written: "For whoever keeps the whole law but fails in one point has become accountable for all of it. For he who said, “Do not commit fossil roostery,” also said, “Do not spill the Crow.” If you commit fossil roostery but do not spill the Crow, you have still become a transgressor of the law." And so it is written and so I have sinned.
  3. Zubb

    Zubb he went that-a-way... Supporter

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    God so loved the world that he gave us KTM. That whosoever roosteth with them shall not perish but have everlasting joy.
    staticPort likes this.
  4. RedDogAlberta

    RedDogAlberta High Plains Drifter

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    The new “family size” prototype is so wide that a lightweight, folding framework could easily turn it into a chair for leisurely discussion around the fire after dinner with beverages.
  5. Belgradian

    Belgradian Been here awhile

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  6. Zubb

    Zubb he went that-a-way... Supporter

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    for the win ^^^
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  7. Joe Motocross

    Joe Motocross Adjustafork.com - CEO

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    Misc custom parts mostly for motorcycles and snowbikes. I made some friends their wedding rings also. :lol3
  8. Joe Motocross

    Joe Motocross Adjustafork.com - CEO

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    I don't think you guys are quite getting this Adjustafork 8.0 Libtard Forest Rake. It's only a joke. Sarcasm. Not real.

    That said, I appreciate the various ponderings. Just don't overthink it too much. The Fundamentalist doesn't ask too many questions and always keeps things simple:
  9. Joe Motocross

    Joe Motocross Adjustafork.com - CEO

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    We rolled into Hite for fuel. This self-serve pump has been reliable for a number of years now. That said, you really shouldn’t ever count on this place for anything. It’s pretty much abandoned since the lake isn’t anywhere near it anymore. The store is supposedly open. I haven’t been there when it is for a long time.
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    We rolled north. The route choice was a graded road.
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    An hour or so later we came to a crossroads where we needed to make a decision. Our decision was based on what town we’d likely make it to that evening with an open grocery store. With that in mind, our trajectory was going to be a high speed route that would cover quite a few miles.
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    It’s complete madness out here. Easy to lose one’s mind.
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    We approached an old dugway that would slow us down for a short period of time. I figured I could get some cool photos of Hotstuff as we ascended. She was on fire though and I couldn’t ever get in front of her.
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    We’d come to a technical section and instead of stopping to assess, she just kept punching it!
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    Once we climbed the dugway, it was high speed graded roads for another hour and a half. Hotstuff was really putting it to the old 520. I was blasting about as fast as I could on the 950 to stay out in front so she wasn’t eating dust. I’d stop occasionally and she’d be right there! I was impressed.
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    We made it to the store with not much time to spare before closing. We’d punched Hite to Green River in a little under 4 hours. Not bad.
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    We were getting tight on light. However, we were well stocked up and I had just the campsite we needed ahead.
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    chudzikb, willibauer, mnTwin and 30 others like this.
  10. staticPort

    staticPort Meditrider Supporter

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    Of course it's real; I seen a picture on the internet . . . :imaposer
  11. Zubb

    Zubb he went that-a-way... Supporter

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    Oh I knew it was a joke. Doesn't mean it couldn't happen though. There's a sucker born every minute. :lol2
    Joe Motocross likes this.
  12. Zubb

    Zubb he went that-a-way... Supporter

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    Epic photo's . . . per usual. Nice work Joe.
    Joe Motocross and outbacktm like this.
  13. Norty01

    Norty01 Occupant

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    LOL!!!
  14. Joe Motocross

    Joe Motocross Adjustafork.com - CEO

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    We were headed for the same camp Swag and I had used four nights earlier. It had been a long day. Our headlights were starting to light up the old enduro trail.
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    We landed at the beach and immediately started collecting some firewood while we still had light.
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    After some initial campsite prep, there was just enough light left for a swim! I don’t think I’ve ever had a trip where I swam this much. This is a testimony to how hot it was this fall.
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    For starting a fire, I like to use a little gasoline in a ziplock that I get from one of the petcocks on our bikes. I pour a little on the pile of wood. Then I pour a little on the end of a stick, light the stick then use the stick to light the pile of wood. Pretty safe as far as using something as flammable as gas.
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    We discovered a new hors d'oeuvre that’s destined for the cookbook. Wrap a stick of string cheese in a tortilla (street style size worked great) then spear it with the Adjustafork. Campfire cheesestick!!
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    Then it was on to the main course of brats. This is as easy as it gets and we needed easy after the long day. We bought enough for dinner and some leftovers for lunch the next day.
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    To finish the brats, we removed them one at a time from one Adjustafork, wrapped them in a tortilla and stuck them on the other fork. We also had a bag of salad from the store. This ended up being a super solid and easy meal and there really isn’t anything much better than cooking over the coals.
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    We unrolled our sleeping bag in front of the fire and Hotstuff crawled in and called it a night. I sat around the fire for a little longer. I was missing sipping on Crow but it wasn’t all that bad. It was peaceful enjoying the night with a clear head although I was trying to figure out what to do to pass the time. My conclusion is that I don't think I'll totally eliminate Crow from these journeys. Sitting around the fire with meat on your Adjustafork and whiskey in your cup is so embedded into the Fundamentalist lifestyle that it really is sacrilegious not to do it. Maybe just don't push it to "blacking out" every night.
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  15. Sparrowhawk

    Sparrowhawk Long timer Supporter

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    I can relate. The cold, wet, fall weather combined with thoughtful COVID-19 self restrictions on activities like going to the gym has added a bit around my middle. The good news is that a shot of Old Crow is only about 100 calories, or about 1/3 the amount of a good beer. 100 calories is a drop in the bucket in the typical 2,500 calorie daily intake of an adult male.

    Timing matters too. Alcohol causes increased activity in Agouti-Related Peptide neurons. These are the neurons that are fired when the body experiences starvation. A little (or a lot) of alcohol before dinner will make you more hungry and eat more, exacerbating the alcohol calorie intake. A little alcohol after dinner doesn't lead to overeating (unless you happen to have brought along chocolate). Of course the problem is that if a shot of Old Crow around the fire is nice then five or six is even better. That's when the wheels fall off.

    As the Greek poet Hesiod said in 700 bc, "observe due measure; moderation is best in all things." On the other hand, as Oscar Wilde said “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” An occasional black out doesn't hurt anything until the next day.
  16. Joe Motocross

    Joe Motocross Adjustafork.com - CEO

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    The Presiding High Council has just appointed you “1st Crow Council”. We’ve been looking for someone with your whiskey wisdom for some time. Welcome.
    chudzikb, liv2day, Cafeguzzi and 3 others like this.
  17. Alancarl2002

    Alancarl2002 n00b Supporter

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    Maybe someone has posted this before... Is it time to write the rules for the followers? something like this? https://www.velominati.com/
  18. kirbybikes

    kirbybikes Been here awhile

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    The fun is reading all the old ride reports and finding the little nuggets of wisdom. Learning the origins of ADV-F and being educated on things you didn't think you need to know.

    Now if I can just erase the image from my brain of the "weenie roast fire starter" pic. That is something I did not need to know.
  19. Sparrowhawk

    Sparrowhawk Long timer Supporter

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    I'm honored and ready to serve. I think more study is in order to expand my knowledge. Now where did I put that bottle of Uncle Nearest? MMMmmm.... there it is. Ahhhh... tasty.
    Joe Motocross likes this.
  20. Sparrowhawk

    Sparrowhawk Long timer Supporter

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    Don't forget the picture of the brat skewered lengthwise on the fork. At least that's what it was claimed to be.