Stupid things heard from sales people

Discussion in 'The Perfect Line and Other Riding Myths' started by BeardedBlunder, Nov 16, 2016.

  1. CPTCO

    CPTCO Been here awhile

    Apr 18, 2016
    "Oh these things are great on dirt. Look at the tires, they are made for gravel roads"

    2016 Harley Fat Bob
    CowboyFatBob, shinyribs and flei like this.
  2. baekdongmul

    baekdongmul Been here awhile

    Dec 17, 2014
    This spring in a Suzuki dealership. It was like overhearing someone plan a murder:

    Young man looks about 20 and he's got big eyes for the brand new GSXR1000 sitting with a nice discount on it. I hear him say he has never ridden a motorcycle but all his buddies are telling him not to start on a small bike because he'll get bored in a few weeks.

    Salesman pounces on the kid with the most vile bullshit: "Well, this here bike has special riding modes: A, B, and C. See, your first year you put it on C and it makes only about 100HP. Second year put it on B and it makes a bit more power..." etc, etc

    Are these people even human?
    Slick67ss likes this.
  3. Conedodger

    Conedodger Wanna Ride

    Apr 12, 2011
    Upstate, NY
    I bought a used Acura at a dealership. Got the hard sell on the extended warranty. Said I wasn't interested and was told "you realize when you drive off the lot you won't have any coverage." That is when I reminded them that the 2 year old Acura still had 2 years remaining on the factory warranty. :fpalm
    Benduro and flei like this.
  4. eatpasta

    eatpasta Lawnmower Target

    Jul 5, 2006
    Santa Barbara, Ca
    before the new CB1100 came out a few years ago, I had heard about it and went into the dealership in Hollywood to learn about it as at the time I proudly had an '83 CB1100F.

    I went in and asked the sales guy about the 1100 and he had never heard of it and insisted that Honda had never made an 1100.

    It was VERY satisfying to invite him into the parking lot!!


  5. Bill 310

    Bill 310 Poser Emeritus Super Supporter

    Dec 4, 2002
    Slip 35
    It is even more fun when your wife (mid 50's)wants a new bike.

    My wife "I am here to look for a new motorcycle"

    Salesman to me, What do you want to spend?

    Me, "I don't want to spend anything"

    Salesman, "But don't you want her to be happy?"

    Me, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

    Salesman,"... but your wife wants a new motorcycle?"

    Me , "She does"

    Salesman, "What do you think she woul like?"

    Me, now greatly amused, "Why don't you ask her"

    Salesmen , half looking at my wife , "What do you think you would like , we have some pretty 250 cruisers over here, and they come in 2 colours,"

    My wife, "I want to get a price on the new 2006 FJR"

    Salesman, "Really, that is a lot of bike for a rider to handle" he is looking at me .

    My wife to me, "why is this so hard?"

    Salesman to me , " I am just trying to keep your wife safe on the road."

    My wife, " Thank you for your concern I will be buying elsewhere."

    Salesman, "do you want to try sitting on the 250 before you go? A lot of ladies like the red ones and I have the only red one left in BC."

    As we got in the car, I said to my wife well at least he didn't talk to your tits, he kept perfect eye contact with me the whole time.

    We started howling with laughter. She rode her FJR coast to coast 3 times and sold it when it became too heavy to manage 5 years later.
    bmac, ONandOFF, ErGuss and 25 others like this.
  6. dwizum

    dwizum Long timer

    Jan 18, 2014
    I got the same thing buying the last new car I purchased. Local dealer claimed that not only could no dealer get one in the color I wanted right now, but that there were simply none in stock, in any color, anywhere in the state, so the best I could do is leave him a deposit and wait.

    Two hours later I was buying that car, in the color I wanted, at a dealership in the next city over (same state). I had three to pick from on their lot.
    Benduro and Wearyeyed like this.
  7. Schmokel

    Schmokel Long timer

    Jun 29, 2015
    Up. And to the right.
    Buying my DR. Woman was printing out the paperwork n' stuff.

    So you plan on doing a some trails?


    See. I knew that. I'm part psychic. Its a gift I have.


    I guess the fact I'm buying an off road motorcycle wasn't obvious enough.
    cal08, Scot66, Bitingdog and 4 others like this.
  8. Reduxalicious

    Reduxalicious Or is it?!

    Jan 25, 2013
    Houston, Texas
    Back when I was looking for a new bike, sitting just because I was curious on a Tiger 1200

    Salesman: what do you ride at the moment?

    Me: K1200R

    Salesman: Oh that bike you're on will own your current bike in speed

    Me: ah huh sure.

    HD dealership waiting for my dad who was buying a part, looking at a VRod

    Salesman: Nice bike, ain't she?

    Me: Yea, I don't care for the forward controls though, that would take some getting used to

    Salesman: yea, but these bikes are fast, I'd say this thing is almost as fast as a hayabusa only more comfortable

    And I try to contain my laughter as I walk away, i know stock for stock my r1200r will walk one, let alone what a busa would do to me then it.
    Scot66, Benduro and shinyribs like this.
  9. aldend123

    aldend123 Long timer

    Sep 1, 2011
    Bristol County MA
    Wow! What sales person passes on the opportunity to sell a helmet and matching jacket? And long game, you need your customers alive and functional to buy more bikes.
    I don't have any bike dealership gems. But your experience has a lot of the same vibe from a car one I witnessed. I'll never forget the time the salesmen couldn't understand that my mom didn't need her husband's permission to buy the car, and that it was for her. He wasn't there, she explained half-seriously that he wouldn't be allowed to drive it. She also had to explain that I was only there for advice. He kept paying attention to things I said about cool cars we walked by, or asking whether my mom wanted to 'talk things over with her husband' or 'bring him down' or 'what does he want?'. She had to instruct him very clearly multiple times that his input was not relevant. She was ready to sign papers and knew very specifically what she wanted. I don't see how he could have lost an easier sale.
  10. chazbird

    chazbird Long timer

    Jul 31, 2009
    I've heard my share, usually overhearing them in a showroom - its a laugh riot. But there must also be a game with a payoff amongst sales staff to see what insane stuff they can make up and see who believes it.
    Bar None likes this.
  11. DR Donk

    DR Donk Been here awhile

    Jul 30, 2009
    Western Michigan
    This story is from when the wife and I were looking at houses. I wasn't interested in the house we were being shown and asked the realtor what other ones we could look at? He tells me that this is a great house and if we don't buy it, he has someone right around the corner who will buy it instantly. I tell him, well you don't have to worry about selling it then, do you? His face? :bluduh
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  12. jay547

    jay547 Long timer

    Feb 6, 2011
    Broken Arrow, OK
    I don't know if it was stupid or not, I was just being honest. Back when I was racing motocross, every two or three years I would sell my bike and buy a new one. I had one for sale and a kid (probably sixteen) came over to look at it with his grandpa. While he was riding it, the grandpa asked, "Has it been ridden hard?" I replied with, "I rode the hell out of it. But I maintained it." They bought it for the asking price...
  13. inline4

    inline4 Long timer

    Nov 9, 2008
    Bike sticker had the price, "plus fees". I ask the salesman, how much are the fees. "They are all different."
    I sez, how about a ballpark price? He sez. "well you know all ballparks are different."
    I get really pissed, & decide there would be no sale from this guy.
    But I wasted a lot of his time as he went thru the whole spiel on several bikes. I was waiting on somebody and had a few hrs to kill, so I just seemed really interested in buying something. I did enjoy talking about bikes but the other guys were going to be sellers, he wasn't going to be selling while I had him tied up.
    Scot66 likes this.
  14. ydarg

    ydarg Miscreant

    Nov 11, 2015
    Above the Equator
    Sign number one someone has no idea.

    Uhm, that's what it was made for sir.
  15. Mecano

    Mecano Been here awhile

    Jan 31, 2014
    New Mexico
    "I removed the air cleaner, it runs better without it"
  16. Florida Lime

    Florida Lime Long timer Supporter

    Sep 5, 2008
    As stated and not often enough in Robbinsville, NC
    The call from the local dealer may have been accurate. They can check the computer to see what models are available at other dealers in the region at that moment. If you were picking a bike up, it would not show up as available - it was sold already. I doubt you asked for a list of dealers that had already sold the color you wanted. :lol3
    Wearyeyed likes this.
  17. toy4fun

    toy4fun GET out of the way

    Feb 21, 2011
    Beautiful downtown Roy, WA
    Not sure what was said but, I met this short legged young lady on a exit on I-90 several minutes after she had flown in from OK to pick up a Triumph motorcycle the size of a tank. The dealer sold her a 3 Cylinder behemoth which she had put on the side stand and could not get it back up from the slight curve of the exit ramp. My first Harley they did not warn me to NOT pull into a downhill parking spot front tire up against the curb....because you will need a crap load of people to get it out!:lol3
    BeardedBlunder likes this.
  18. Fattytwocakes

    Fattytwocakes Long timer

    Jan 26, 2016
    Northern NSW Australia.
    How were they to know that you didn't know what you were doing?:D If they had told you, would you have then been insulted?:-)

    As an ex dealer, yeah, yeah I know, :rayofyou should here some of the stupid things that customers/tyre kickers say that we had to try and either not laugh or say something to show them up. It goes both ways stupidity.
    ONandOFF likes this.
  19. dwizum

    dwizum Long timer

    Jan 18, 2014
    Let's hear your worst! I think it's fair that the thread goes both ways. As long as it stays good natured, I suppose. I have a friend in the motorcycle dealership business, he's told me some good ones!
    mylastbike likes this.
  20. allowishish

    allowishish Boof Master

    Dec 7, 2014
    Denver...ish, CO
    not the dealer saying it, more of the above post type.

    I got a chuckle out of a guy buying a K1600 in Daytona during bike week. He refused all of the staff's education attempts... because he knew it all.
    Yup, he gets on the bike, starts it up, jumps the curb and smacks into a tree.

    Me? oh I laughed.... very much out loud.
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