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Discussion in 'Ride Reports - Day Trippin'' started by _trogdor_, Sep 12, 2018.
[Click me ->] A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away....
Well, the idea for another ride started rolling around in my head earlier this summer. I had that itch, the problem was I didn't have anything to scratch.
Until, that is, I met another guy at work.
Tale as old as time...boy sees ride report. Ride report convinces boy to buy motorcycle. Trogdor sees motorcycle. Trogdor meets boy. Boy falls in love with Trogdor. And they planned rides happily ever after. Or something like that.
Anyway, we started day dreaming about doing a ride. He talked big, I talked bigger. Eventually, the word "Idaho" started getting thrown around. And then the stars aligned.
We ended up working on the same project together at work and that job would require us to travel to Idaho for some field testing. Bingo.
The plan was simple: 1) ship bikes to Idaho, 2) ride the IDBDR, 3) do some work, and 4) come home.
But of course, an adventure without obstacles is hardly an adventure at all.
Cant wait! Just got caught up from the TAT adventure
It was a busy summer for the Trogdor clan.
BabyTrog got promoted to LittleTrog when the 2018 model BabyTrog was introduced.
TrogCat died, and now resides in a tiny can on the mantle.
TrogDad had another heart attack.
TrogMom has gone mad with quilting-fever.
@Mrs. Trogdor is back to work.
The TrogMobile went quietly into that good night.
And I traveled a lot...and had a minor TAT-related broken neck situation to deal with.
So life's been busy. But the point is...there's never a good time to do awesome shit.
And I do have the urge for some awesome shit.
Now, I told you that story, only so that I can tell you this story.
Which is...we leave in a week...and I'm not ready.
@jimmyrig Welcome aboard.
Now, the short version of why I'm not ready is that, I'm kinda lazy and haven't gotten around to prepping, other than buying some gear and farkles for Wexter-2, which still currently reside in a tower of boxes in the garage.
But the long version is that following the TAT, I had to sell off my stable of bikes to pay down the credit card bill for Wexter-2 (see Trogdor rides the TAT), which caused me to stop riding everyday, which cascaded into a general lack of daily awesomeness, and an uptick in bouts of "whiny little bitch". And I spiraled into an existential funk as I started losing the war against the perpetual mid-life crisis I've been combating since 6th grade. I fell into the trap of the "daily grind" and succumbed to the populous call of a"normal life", those siren songs of mediocrity, those meat-grinders of masculinity, and each day I could feel myself slip ever deeper into a hole, where the only dream left was the one that confronts you in the dark of the night pawing at the most primal parts of your mind. The sharp realization that you'll never fuck a porn-star and the burning question: Have I become "the soccer mom" of men?
I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.
You see, what I'm trying to say is that Wexter-2 hasn't really moved in two years, and I've got some work to do.
After the cool intro, I'm in!
What did Strongbad have to say about this?
Loved the intro, really looking forward to reading more adventures, I really enjoyed your TAT report. I don't remember the broken neck though, what's up with that?
Wooo! Can't wait to follow another trogdor adventure! I can see a Wexter-3 in the future.......
Well, @Zaboo65, I remember it like it was only yesterday...
...Day 24 of my TAT adventure.
Wexter and I had been running hard and fast. It was too hard, and too fast [she said]. And my inexperience finally caught up with me in Northern California, where all it took was a patch of sand, and I gave myself a high velocity suplex over the bars and into the berm.
The term "got my bell rung" is appropriate here.
I was no stranger to a nice afternoon dirt nap at this point, and had no reason to really think anything of it at the time. Of course my neck hurt, but then again, everything hurt. So suck it up, buttercup. Onward!
Flash forward two years...still got that sore neck.
Occasionally, @Mrs. Trogdor would ask me about it, and I'd say "Oh it's nothing, I'm just pretty sure it's broken". "Ha ha", she'd say, as her eyes roved over my sinewy body, pausing only long enough to savor every ripple and buldge, "you're so funny and ruggedly handsome, Trogdor. I don't care if your spinal damage progresses forever. I'll still spoon feed you."
[Oh sorry, copy and paste error, from something else I'm working on.]
"Trogdor!?", you ask, "Why didn't you see a doctor sooner?"
Well Padawan, firstly it's because I'm a bad-ass and suffering builds character, but also because I live in the health-care equivalent of a third-world banana republic.
So, with that in mind, when BabyTrog arrived in May @Mrs. Trogdor laid down a most exquisite and thoroughly American challenge: "Now that we've paid our out-of-pocket insurance maximum for the baby, I bet you can't get all of your chronic health issues fixed before the end of the benefit period."
Well my dear...challenge accepted!
With the deadline fast approaching, and an iron will to become the world's most medically okay-iest man, I subjected myself to a whirlwind of doctor visits.
I was poked. I was prodded. I was scanned. I was filmed. I was even tortured with a medical grade tazer. [No really, this exists. It's called a Nerve Conduction Study, and it's a cross between acupuncture and Don't Whizz on the Electric Fence.]
After many visits, the doctor finally came to the same conclusion that I had when I walked in the door for the first time..."Dude, your neck is broken." Proving, once again, that I did truly break one of everything on the TAT.
That's right boys and girls, little ol' Trogdor popped two cervical disks in that leatherneck of his. [I'm told these are important.]
Now all things considered, I didn't feel too worse for the wear, but when the doc heard that some of my extra curricular activities included pro-wrestling, jiu-jitsu, and a slice of motorcycling on the side, he immediately recommended that I take two aspirin, have an anterior cervical discectomy and fusion, and call him in the morning.
So I did.
And oh by the way doc, can you hurry this up, I've got a bet with the Mrs.
Now don't worry folks, it takes more than a traumatic spinal injury to keep a good Trog down. And I wasn't down for long.
In fact, the whole procedure only takes a few hours, and I was [no bullshit] singing a slightly-drugged cover of Queen to the nurses on my way out the door.
Yeah, that's right, I can sing. You wanna fight about it!
Anyway, I was home for lunch the same day.
Sadly, however, I lost the bet, and it looks like I'm paying for this one. I knew I shouldn't have gone to the doctor.
So what's a laid-up Trogdor to do? That's right...start buying stuff for the trip.
Stuff like...a new bivy sack, sleeping pad, and sleeping bag.
Stuff like...a new GPS and holder.
Stuff like...a new waterproof top-bag and wider foot pegs.
New gloves and riding boots.
And, for no particular reason,...a neck brace.
My compatriot, of course, let's call him "Le Biebs", was busy doing likewise.
"CREDIT CARD HAS ENTERED THE GAME!"
He snagged a low-mileage Honda CRF250L, and per my tutelage purchased a bash plate, radiator guard, wide pegs, luggage rack, rotopax, and some tools.
There's no turning back now. And just like that, Trog-solo became a Trog-duo. For the mathematically challenged, that's 1 better.
With bike-fever and the call of adventure running rampant through the office we almost convinced @Swigg to join us. In fact, he even bought a CRF250L too. [By coincidence I'm sure.] We could be a Trog-trio!
I talked another guy, Pickle Rick, into drop shipping a Chinese dual-sport to his front door, just in time for the ride.
We could be a Trog-Quatro!
But then just as quickly, it all fell apart.
@Swigg, like a responsible man, put his family first, and Pickle Rick, like a naive man, shot himself in the head by checking with his wife.
Which is why, sadly, this report is "Trogdor and friend", singular, instead of the much more spectacular "Trogdor and friends", plural.
That's alright, this way reminds me more of grade school anyway.
With our ride date quickly approaching, and with work breathing down our necks. Our timeline was getting tighter and tighter.
We realized that it was going to take too long to ride out and back, plus complete the ride, plus make it to our test event without people noticing that we were MIA.
In order to make it happen, we would have to ship the bikes. To the internet!
I tried to get a quote from everyone on the first page of my Google search and recorded it all in this spreadsheet.
Now, everyone prices stuff a little bit differently, so doing a direct comparison wasn't exactly possible.
But as it turns out, it wasn't necessary either, because due to some unforeseen medical bills this summer, every option was too expensive.
I broke the news to Le Biebs. We both wavered a little bit, but neither of us was willing to yield.
We briefly considered driving them out in his truck, but even tag-teaming it non-stop, might not leave us enough time.
So we fell back to the ancient and noble Socratic method of problem solving: interrogative dialogue.
"What do you want to do?", I said.
"I dunno, what do you want to do?", he replied.
"I dunno. I'll do whatever you wanna do", I said.
"Yeah, me too.", he replied.
And so it was settled.
I’d barbecue that anterior cervical thing. Looks tasty.
No, @conchscooter , you don't want to eat dragon-man BBQ.
Much like eating the heart of your enemy imbues you with their power, so to, does dragon meat cause rare and mysterious transmutations in the body.
Of course, it's possible, as we all learned in school, that injesting trace amounts of dragon blood may transform you into a dragon-man yourself by drawing from the shared pool of dragon-force energy in the universe. [A situation known as the "reverse Highlander". Not to be confused with the sex-act of the same name.]
But, it's also possible that the transformation process itself is just too awesome and violent to be survivable given your current state, and a failed merge may kill not only you, but myself, and clan, as well. Such are the vagaries of arcane magic.
So, at least for the time being, Conch, I strongly advise you to avoid dragon meat, and stick to the bland items on your tube-feeding menu.
Fixed that one for ya.
Just from following you for a while, Am guessing the mrs does that frequently ...
Read your TAT report with great interest and jealousy. Made me want to run it once, just to say i was as cool as trogdor. But now that i see you did it AND broke your neck, it seems the bar has been raised.
Very well, game on.
I let Le Biebs borrow my heat gun this weekend to help him install some new grips. His first attempt didn't work out well and he trimmed too much off the end when making space for his bark busters, so he's going to try again with a second set. He bought the bike with only about 400 miles on it, so other than some bolt on mods (which he already did), his steed is ready to go.
As for Wexter-2, he's got leaky fork seals, which I want to deal with before taking off. I haven't done fork seals before, so that's a little intimidating. I know you old greasy wrenches out there won't think twice about it, but for us young guns...well...you never forget your first time, and I want it to be perfect. All the parts have arrived, so I just need to get out in the garage and do it.
And I figure while I've got the forks off, I might as well go ahead and grease the steering head bearing too. A couple other WR guys have all warned me not to put this off. Apparently, the robots in the Yammy factory don't like to get their digits dirty so that bearing is just plain dry. I suppose I can fix that. How hard can it be?
After the TAT, I did do a pretty decent job of catching up on maintenance, so Wexter hasn't been totally neglected.
I put on fresh tires, swapped the new-ish chain and sprockets from Wexter-1 [RIP], did an oil change, and put in fresh filters.
Added some fuel stabilizer to the tank and put battery tender on the ol' electron box.
So I wasn't surprised then, when Wexter fired right up and started purring for me the other day.
"Good boy, Wex!"
The only other "have to do it" item on my checklist is to get my chain adjusted properly. I had lots of problems previously with the chain eating the slider and frame, and I really don't want to deal with that again. I think the new bigger sprockets (front an rear) will definitely help, so the problem may already be resolved. But it still warrants a proper look.
Other than that, bike wise, I've got some stuff that I may or may not install...time permitting: like a windshield, wider pegs, and a bar riser. This trip is short, so there's nothing I can't suffer through if it doesn't get put on.
The only thing that keeps me awake at night is whether I should put on more aggressive tires or not.
I'm currently running Shinko SR241 Trials Tires, which are still practically new mileage wise, but I have no idea how they'll perform off-road.
I waiver on whether I should just buy a fresh set of the stock tires, the infamous Trailwings, since they seemed adequate to me the first time around. But then again, I've also got left-over Pireli Scorpions I could use, if the situation calls for it and we minimize our time on the slab.
The root problem though, is that I haven't finished planning or researching our route. So any tire decision at this point is kinda just a best guess.
I should probably get on with that...
So we both knew that Idaho was kinda out of the picture for this year, but neither of us wanted to really admit it. We vowed to do some ride, any ride, at least, since we'd both already put a hold-the-date on our calendars and started planning for it.
If shipping was going to be too expensive, that means we've got to do something within a reasonable riding/trailering distance, but the mid-west just doesn't have the selection of trails that the west does.
Luckily, the Mid-Atlantic BDR was just recently completed. The first, and so far only, BDR not located in the West.
And conveniently, we're also NOT located in the west. It is also about 1k miles long and should take us less than a week. Which is almost exactly have much time we have. Convenient.
So, the MABDR it shall be.
A match made out of necessity. Perfect!
I really like not having to plan an off-road route myself, so the idea of the BDRs is awesome to me. The fact that I can just decide to do a ride, download the route, and go do it is freaking brilliant. Thanks BDR people!
Of course, we've still got to get to and from the trail. I spent a few hours looking for other sweet rides along our path, and then started manually creating a route, but I soon realized that this was just going to expand our timeline back out to the "Can we even get this done?" range. So, at least for the moment, I'm resigned to just doing whatever Google Maps tells me to do as long as it avoids the high-way.
Which means our total route will look something like this.
I hereby christen thee: The Cincy MABDR Loop (TM)
Outbound (Cincinnati, OH to Damascus, VA): 303 miles
MABDR (Damascus, VA to Lawrenceville, PA): 1,080 miles
Return (Lawrencevill, PA to Cincinnati, OH): 515 miles
For a total of 1,898 miles.
Route planning complete.