WARPED XII APRIL 21ST, 22ND & 23RD KERNVILLE CA

Discussion in 'West – California, the desert southwest and whatev' started by stoke, Dec 7, 2015.

  1. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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    WARPED XII

    After a year of constant WARPED XI thread activity, numero twelve is ON you dicks!!!

    Let us not forget what W.A.R.P.E.D. XII actually stands for, you FF's:

    The TWELFTH Western Adventure Rider Party & Endurance Drinking Event.

    April 21st, 22nd & 23rd 2016

    Your ticket INCLUDES unlimited access to the beer (and other libation) kegs.

    Yup.

    It’s included. You can show up, park, set up camp and go to town as much as you want. Truly a life changing event for many-some of us barely make it out of camp..! There is also the super secret voluntary donation SPIRITS TABLE for those of us who enjoy cocktails or whiskey (having one right now as I type this, actually).


    Let’s talk about the significance of number TWELVE, this being the twelfth WARPED.

    There may be twelve steps to recovery in some of the programs out there, but for those of us who AREN’T quitters, there are twelve steps to WARPED!!!!

    1) You admit you are powerless over WARPED.
    2) You believe WARPED is a greater power and can return you to insanity.
    3) You make a decision to turn your will over to the care of WARPED as you understand it.
    4) You make a searching, fearless moral inventory of your ADV riding and endurance drinking capability.
    5) You admit to WARPED and yourself the nature of your previous ADV wrongs.
    6) You are entirely ready to remove the defect in your character of NOT going to WARPED.
    7) You humbly ask the past HDIC’s & noob welcome squad to remove your shortcomings.
    8) You make a list of all the times you’ve not partied or rode hard enough (either one is ok) and be willing to make amends at WARPED.
    9) You make direct amends by personally taking action on these matters.
    10) You continue to take fearless personal & public inventory of these shortcomings in your ADV life in the thread all the way up to WARPED XII.
    11) You sought through the bottom of a bottle to improve your conscious contact with Bacchus, the god of wine, ritual madness, and parties, as you understand his will and power.
    12) Having a spiritual and existential awakening as a result of these steps, carrying this message to other ADV inmates on our beloved site.


    There are also TWELVE gods in the Greek pantheon, BACCHUS, the god of wine, winemaking, parties and ritual madness, being the most important for this event - and he HAS given his blessing to this, our twelfth WARPED!!!

    “Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may wet my mind and say something clever.”

    Aristophanes
    (the Greeks knew what was up)


    Oh man. You know I love this event.

    What is WARPED?

    It’s an outstanding of group of adv riders of any and all stripes, who are awesome humans and down for anything. Want to ride hardcore singletrack on a little bike? Plenty of folks have and are doing that.

    Want to wallow your 500+lb pig around off pavement? TONS of those guys around (that would be me last year, someone has two up off pics).

    Want to ride pavement only on some overloaded two wheeled dreadnought the size of a Honda Fit? Yep, Kernville has some of the most outstanding paved motorcycle roads in CA and plenty of other folks around to join in with ya.

    Last, but DEFINITELY not least, want to ride in, park it, and hang out all weekend at camp? Well, that would be the rest of us left over!

    Whatever you want to do - it’s cool!

    Once again, Mountain & River Adventures is hosting this Bacchanal/Festival/Party/ADV Rally/Clusterfck:



    15775 Sierra Way Kernville CA, 93238

    MRA'S website is here: http://www.mtnriver.com/

    In tradition, we have reserved the entire upper campground for Friday and Saturday nights.

    There are also ten sites reserved for Thursday. And the super secret party we have that night. Thursday night options are limited, so sign up early!!!! It is worth it to show up early, trust me.

    HOW TO SIGN UP :clap:clap:clap

    There is now an order form link posted below this area!

    It will have several options for you to choose; chief among them, are you coming in on Thursday or Friday (if you want to come sooner, make your own arrangements with MRA), and what size/style/number of tshirts do you want and of course, the silicone pint glasses. Because we can't have normal breakable ones around you guys.

    There's a lead time on production for shirts and the sillipints, so the cutoff for ordering these is March 31st


    This form will then charge you based on the options you selected, create the IN list, and so on. There is a confirmation email, and a page that will ask you for things like your email and, most importantly, your screen name and real name. PLEASE USE ACCURATE DATA OR WE CAN'T TELL WHO YOU ARE. Yes this is safe, no I don't have your CC #, yes this is third party verified and secure. Eventbrite had a lot of us struggling last year so we figured we would try this simplified system.

    I stripped this down to ONE form that "does it all" to make it simple and easy for you and those of us organizing it.

    Please don't file a chargeback with your bank if you don't recognize the name on the merchant account which is "AAV".

    THIS IS THE ONLY WAY TO SIGN UP, NO EXCEPTIONS.

    SIGN UP & INVEST IN YOUR FUTURE AWESOMENESS BY CLICKING ON THIS LINK:

    ****

    https://tjl.infusionsoft.com/app/storeFront/showStoreFront

    ****


    NO REFUNDS AFTER 3/15/16
    Sorry adv champions, people back out all the time, and that's FINE - before 3/15/16. After that, you just made a donation to Bacchus!!!

    CAMPING/DRINKING/FOOD:


    Real simple here folks. You have two options. You’re either coming in on Thursday, or you’re coming in on Friday (plus the merchandise options you want).

    If you come in on Thursday, the investment for camping and Saturday night dinner is: $115

    If you come in on Friday, the investment for camping and Saturday night dinner is: $85


    MRA has been hit by the drought HARD and raised their prices a LOT and to get this discounted rate, we had to do the Saturday night dinner through them. SATURDAY DINNER IS INCLUDED IN YOUR TICKET PRICE AND IS MANDATORY. No exceptions. You don’t like it, don’t go.

    Vegetarian (hi Razr) options will be there. Yes, this is the discounted amount. If your panties get in a bunch over this, gently remove your tampon and know that this is the cleanest and best campground in California. Hands down. Flush toilets, outstanding showers, power outlets in bathrooms, multiple drinking water spigots throughout, absolutely stunning scenery, it’s ON the river, it’s incredibly clean everywhere, and close to a nice little downtown in Kernville and BEER ALL NIGHTS & SATURDAY NIGHT FOOD INCLUDED. Plus, we have the whole upper campground for just us!!! Go price an alternative campground like a state or KOA campground and get back to me...then ask for BEER & A CATERED DINNER INCLUDED. THESE ARE COSTS PER PERSON.


    CAMPING

    Tent spots are mostly first come first served. We can usually put 3-5 tents in each site.

    SITE 15 is RESERVED FOR THE HDIC AND HIS MINIONS...

    SITE 17 is RESERVED FOR GERG, WARPED GODFATHER

    RV’S AND TRAILERS: Post on the thread to GERG for questions - he's in charge of THAT hot mess!!!

    Those with RV's, toy haulers, etc. let us know what you are bringing so we can coordinate spots for ease of entrance and exit. I don't want to hear a debate about riding in vs driving in. It's tired. ADV riders come in all stripes and it's all good!

    THINGS TO KNOW IF YOU ARE DRIVING IN:

    RV Note: There are a VERY FEW LIMITED places we can put them, 4-5 sites tops. If you've been there you know what I mean. Because of the limited availability they will be on a first come first parked basis unless previously discussed with the HDIC. Any trailer over 25' is almost impossible to park!!!!! If you think you can get into a space and it's full of tents it'll be up to you to ask them to move (good luck with that). If you're RVing you pays your money and takes your chances. Usually by Friday at noon they are taken. Plan accordingly by asking your scout to stake a claim if you're going to be late. Remember, YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN for finding a place if the prime spots are taken. You BETTER be an ACE at backing......and many, many people will be watching you offering constant advice with drinks in hand hahahahahaha. Ask Shunka last year :lol3.

    DINNER on Saturday night IS included in your ticket price.

    If that really doesn’t work for you, but you’re still going, 1) Thank you for helping out the event and 2) Kern River Brewing Company is very close, as are various markets, grocery stores and other restaurants.

    And I will say this: on Saturday night, the peak of this weekend, you DO NOT want to be putting up with trying to get into town or even trying to start up your camp stove for your ramen and canned tuna. It is just not worth it. The dinner historically has been pretty good and the fact that it comes with the greek style amphitheater for your dinner and the crazy awards/prizes/other stuff party and you don't have to go anywhere or even think about anything? Totally worth it.

















    #1
  2. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

    Joined:
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    THE IN LIST

    1)
    SHUNKA The one and only.
    2) Y E T I.
    3) 1224R
    4) SpongeRob
    5) scottmac
    6) DSM8 Also the one and only dsm8. I mean really. Have you met the guy?!
    7) Shooby BREWMEISTER
    8) JStory
    9) Rockitsynz Game of Trona
    10) rediRrakaD
    11) sopascat
    12) Sfcootz
    13) tag3
    14) Myers79
    15) iifke (maybe you'll show up for more than one night this time!?)
    16) dzrtracin
    17) Downs HAM RADIO COORDINATOR & all around good human
    18) theoneandonlyzippo DOG CZAR.
    19) TDsurf
    20) slugdad*cannot attend
    21) garfey. AKA the Baja Machine.
    22) bdarling
    23) Theredrocket23
    24) Brewer
    25) Number8teen
    26) benduro
    27) Gerg. The OG
    28) montibank
    29) DannyG
    30) JPaccassi
    31) Pest. Ultimate NOOB
    32) Surfgimp
    33) GreeNug
    34) (I^)R/746
    35) rider914
    36) "Friend" of iifke
    37) NSFW. Noob rally originator!!!
    38) FiveOJester
    39) Orange Beast
    40) trrpettus
    41) up in smoke
    42) Dyvking
    43) Mountain-home
    44) KTM Chris
    45) Papa Lobster
    46) Ms Lobster
    47) jmarchitect
    48) Katie M.
    49) GillaFunk
    50) thebrosman
    51) overlandhuskie
    52) Dragon M
    53) Goonsquad
    54) owns1100
    55) Boston Mangler
    56) RVGADV
    57) AdrianAllen
    58) Husky71
    59) nupit
    60) Ben Carufel
    61) OldThomas
    62) Mrs Surfgimp
    63) Molonlabemike
    64) Frednic
    65) RAZR. DV Daze Dude.
    66) 4critter
    67) Brycycle
    68) Freerydejunky. "The Student".
    69) Rideallday. "Number 69".
    70) stucknarut
    71) carpediem75
    73) Bonkers
    #2
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  3. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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    DOG RULES

    Gerg cleans up after the dogs every year when people leave. There is always poop. All dogs will be charged $5 per night collected in cash on site, this pays for the cleanup that has to take place once everyone leaves. Sorry we had to go this way, just what it is now based on some past experiences. Head Dick In Charge is a title for reason. Sometimes you come off as a dick. But it is better for the group as a whole. You know this is true, you FF’s.

    The inmate that wrote this is theoneandonlyzippo ...who knows anything and everything about dogs and henceforth and hereby designated DOG CZAR :jack I'm not even shitting you guys, I went to one of her dog tournament meetup things. Crazy. These dogs run through obstacle courses that would destroy your average crossfitter. Her dog won and is a national champion. 'Nuff said :lol2.

    As always, dogs are welcomed at Warped 2016. We love our fur friends and don't want them to miss out on the fun that we know Warped always is. To help make your fur friend's trip more fun for them, and to be certain they are not a hindrance to anyone else attending, please follow some basic guidelines.

    -Please pick up after your dog. We know that you might not see your dog pop a squat, but if you do or if you see a pile of poo and suspect it might have once belonged to your dog, please pick it up. Even if it's not in the direct campground, other Warpers often walk to the river or drunkenly meander around and the last thing anyone (including you) wants to do is step in a big, steaming pile of dogdoody.

    -Your dog is your responsibility. If you bring your dog, either bring someone with you to watch it, or know that riding is not on your agenda. It's not anyone else's job to keep an eye on your dog while you decide to take off for a few hours (or the day), and inevitably, because most of us are dog lovers, if we see a dog left behind we will take it upon ourselves to care for the dog. Be fair to your dog and be fair to your fellow Warpers. Likewise, bring your own supplies for your dog. This includes a crate/kennel, food, toys, leashes, and potty bags. Don't expect other people to bring supplies for yourdog.

    -Please only bring dogs that you know will enjoy the experience that is WARPED. If your dog is shy, phobic, stressed out by people or strange places, aggressive, or reactive (to dogs or people), please leave them at home. If your dog is recovering from aggression issues, this is not the environment for it. It's not fair to the rest of us, and it's not fair to your dog to subject them to this experience. If yourdog exhibits aggressive behavior towards people or other dogs, we reserve the right to ask you to keep the dog leashed, or even to take the dog home, for it's own safety and the safety of the otherdogs and people around us. You know your dog best, so please respect their limits.
    #3
  4. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

    Joined:
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    HAM RADIO:

    Yeah laugh all you want, but we are setting up a repeater just for WARPED 12. My phone is shit there, radios are much much easier to use than a phone for organizing something like this and I know there are a few ham radio operators among you. Also very handy for long distance bike to bike comms where bluetooth and phones don’t work, or to get ahold of anybody quickly and easily, even if they’re in town. And hey, if you’ve ever thought about getting into ham radio for ADV riding, post up and we’ll answer the questions. It is worth it in California, especially if you go to Baja at all, to have a ham license. And it’s basically free.

    DOWNS is the ham radio coordinator, all questions about it go to him in the thread.

    Radio info for WARPED

    "Simplex Freq will be 446.500. I'm picking 70cm because I'm assuming most people who show up with radios are going to have HTs, and that band seems to work better for HT use.

    We will be running a small crossband repeater on a hill top just for this event. Input will be (Transmit on your HT) will be 447.00 The output will be VHF on 147.500. This will be a low power (4 watt) unit, with battery and limited solar power options.

    This COMPLAN will be subject to change at any time including during the event if conditions warrant it.

    If anyone needs a BAOFENG or similar radio programmed (I can do some Vertex Standard/Yeasus as well) I'll have my cables and software on standby at the campsite to do so.

    I'll also have a basecamp briefcase type radio setup at my campsite and will find a way to get an antenna as high as possible and again setup with solar power more than likely with a 50 watt radio on board.

    If anyone has any questions hit up Downs on this thread or via PM."

    The frequencies will be announced HERE closer to the event
    #4
  5. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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    BEERMEISTER:

    SHOOBY is the beermeister this year, who will be assisted by the past beermeisters and homebrewers of past events. ALL beer and libation questions go to him in the thread. I, umm, was not allowed to be beermeister due to my love of cider and spirits. However, we likely will have a keg of dryer cider for WARPED 12 and possibly a keg of mead depending on how the brew goes for one of our illustrious homebrewers and inmates who will chime in down the road...

    SHUNKA'S BREWFEST IN SAN CLEMENTE YOU SHOULD ATTEND (all details through this link):

    http://advrider.com/index.php?threads/shunkas-2nd-annual-warped-brew-haha-degenerate-thread.1112065/
    #5
    Dan Diego likes this.
  6. Shunka

    Shunka Supervision Required

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    Hmmmm I'll see if I can make it.
    #6
    Dan Diego likes this.
  7. iifke

    iifke Adventurer

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    In for Friday & Saturday.
    #7
  8. Y E T I

    Y E T I Unpossible

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    In. :finger
    #8
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  9. DSM8

    DSM8 Where fun goes to die....

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    In!
    #9
  10. Y E T I

    Y E T I Unpossible

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    Out.
    #10
  11. DSM8

    DSM8 Where fun goes to die....

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    Fuck you ya worthless mook...
    #11
  12. Shunka

    Shunka Supervision Required

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    :stupid

    Whew! We dodged that bullet!
    #12
  13. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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    Oh great. Here we go again with the thread going off the rails in the first few posts :lol3. Speaking of which, I will be posting pics from ALL the WARPED events throughout the thread in no certain order. There are some great ones over the years and it is up to your guys to identify them in the thread
    #13
  14. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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    #14
    Downs likes this.
  15. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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  16. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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    #16
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  17. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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    This would be your beermeister on Just Outstanding on his F800:

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    #17
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  18. Downs

    Downs KK6RBI

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    Hey folks HDIC Minion here. Ready to get out there for WARPED once again.

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    #18
  19. stoke

    stoke ocean minded

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  20. Gerg

    Gerg The Destroyer

    Joined:
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    Full Monte IN! and then some...
    #20