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Discussion in 'Australia' started by FatBoyCrash, Jun 24, 2009.
"Life is hard; its harder if your stupid" John Wayne.
Yup,I had a difficult time with it in my 20's...motorcycling was a big saviour at the time...
But nearly thirty years later I've kinda 'grown' out of it but then again a tough nightshift week can spin ya out some...
just gotta be smart about it and talk to lot of people in my network.
+1, best scenario, never know when the bastard will bite you on the arse!
I tell you what, he's a sneaky mongrel isnt he?
He can sneak in the room even when you think the doors shut!
And sometimes you don't realise he's there until he's made himself quite comfortable on the rug.
Just come across this thread.
Triggers...Mental associations...too hard on myself...high expectations....
fuck, a reality check....some deep breaths.
For me, I guess I relate to the fact I'm adopted and held / hold onto it for so long now. Found out by chance when I was about 11. Felt rejected, no sense of worth, no ownership. Emotional intelligence copped a hiding. Release, let it out. Tried to get close to people, usually ended up getting too close for their comfort, set up for failure, fail. Thought I was weird, different. don't fit in. Started drinking, drugs, kamakazee pilot who couldn't crash. Was a failure at committing suicide.
high IQ doesn't help as overanalyse things. An introvert who appears as an extrovert to feel as though I can fit in. socially inept.
About 6 years ago, I visited a guy who I knew from networking via work.
He was in intensive care. Wasn't sure if I'd ever see him again so had to see him. Remembered that Bikers Anon had a social meet second Tuesday of month at some Crows Nest cafe. Silly me got the wrong week it sems.
Having coffee, about 20 people lob into this cafe looking totally wired. Waited till crowd thinned out and said hello to some girl - can't remember her name. We got talking. We walked to her car. Sat in it and talked for 3 hours. Told me about some group meeting they'd been to.
so I went along to the next one. Really eye opening stuff. what i recall was presenter asking for volunteer - anything had had an issue in life.
so i volunteered. Pip used Time Line therapy on me and the experience was amazing. I signed up for the course that night and did my NLP training.
One of the most memorable things I learnt from that was - "you will always remeber the event however you can change the emotion that is attached to it". This blew me away and still does. I still spend too many hours involved in my work as a way of distracting myself from my loneliness. i also give time to charity and the community as a way of feeling good internally.
To me, the recent OCR has been an inspiration and transformational. Not only was it my first, I tripled my dirt riding experience, but afterwards, I rode to Chinchilla to where my birth mother was born. I tracked down where she went to school at Burra Burri and camped there the night. I inspected school records and ventured into state forest to where she lived in a bush camp whilst my grandfather worked for Forestry. I've since met my mothers aunt and next week will travel into victoria to put my arms around my mother.
It was good to get that out.
no, don't re-read it - just send it.
Damn dust just got in my eye.
You're on quite a journey. It sounds like you are finding some the pieces that help you make sense of your World. There will always be a few missing . Take each day as it comes and give yourself a pat on the back at the end of each one.
Just live the moment and don't try to rationalise it.
Our paths to recovery are lined with hurdles and obstacles we encounter each and every day. Take one step at a time, each day as it comes!
Your journey is going to be exciting, good luck with that!
Finding your birth parents must be filled with mixed emotions, what a life experience, we'll be with you!
Just heard another mate has succumbed to the 'black dog'
Will post more when I know
F$%ckin Mongrel. Not another one. I think thats three since I started this very thread.
I started this thread a while back with all the well meaning and good intentions in the world.
I still have that, but in all honesty my dog scares the living piss out of me. When I look back at how my emotional state has shaped my life it's not something I'd care to repeat.
3 conscious suicide attempts that were really just screams for help, lots and lots of alcohol abuse for self medication reasons and a whole lot of anger/aggression that was just inexcusable. Doctors that just kept goin' back to the drug cabinet until I was quite literally a drooling moron.
I have the good intentions but dunno how to take the first steps to start helping people. Quite honestly the overwhelming response frightened me and made me wonder if I'd gone in over my head. Sorry. Apologies.
There is good news. I wanted a logo for our Black Dog Australia. Something easily recognizable. So I wrote to Reg Mombassa offering to beg borrow steal for a logo.
I didn't hear anything for a while so forgot about it.
Then stuff me if I didn't get an email back from his manager.
"Dear Shannon, here's the picture Reg has done for you.."
For free. Nix. Nuttin. Doesn't get any better.
I'd like to produce some bumper stickers or T shirts. Anyone done this and know who to speak to or go about it??? Preferably in the SE Qld area?
Just so if you see the logo, you know you have someone to talk to.
I have two tags in mind. A sticker or T shirt with "I have a dog" or "Men of the Black Dog, Australia"
Maybe later for the long suffering family and friends of Black Dog keepers "I know a bloke with a Dog!"
Over to you.
Strummer is getting some stickers and T'shirts done for the snail trail rides so he may be able to help you...
Smelly dog might have some ideas for T-shirts, he's very helpful.
(Ummm, is this thread only for blokes?)
Hi Miss Jane.
Not that I'm aware of! But when it comes to wimmens, well, clueless doesn't even begin to describe the FatBoy.....
Half the time I reckon me bloke has more of a clue about what's going on in my soup filled head than I do. The other half, well that's anybody's guess. As for other gells, I dunno either.
well me too i guess. for as long as i can remember. sometimes it's like being stuck in a hole. ( and i'm not just talking about living in wilcannia !) writing my thoughts down helps. as does riding. i find riding great because it takes me out of my little world.
Are you trying to get me in trouble..:eek1
Smelly Dog is an outlawed brand... be aware...
By the way, bloody great design, I hope you get it up & running & put me down for one if you get them made....
I have some good friends with the Black Dog & recently felt very humbled when one told me how much I had helped him to hang around...
Keep up the good work, the more we talk the more we learn...
I find it hard to think that anger & the dog go hand in hand.
Well bugger me, I'm pretty sure it does. & to top it all off I am told that this is perfectly normal ?
Good idea about the shirts. Keep the dog on a leash.
RIP - 'Twiggy', Vietnam Veteran, Harley Rider,
always @ 'Capital' Rally, didn't know him for long, good for a yarn & a laugh,
will be missed by those that knew him,
ride hard, ride long, ride forever old son,
i've heard depression described as anger without enthusiasm.
I THINK Freud described depression as anger turned inwards. Makes sense for me anyway.