Who else lives with the Black Dog?

Discussion in 'Australia' started by FatBoyCrash, Jun 24, 2009.

  1. Canary

    Canary Long timer

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    Not such a great Fathers Day down here in good old Victoria. :(

    I am not coping well with the current situation and am sitting in front of the computer reading the restrictions we will be continuing to face until by the looks of it November the 23rd.

    I miss seeing my sons, my grandsons, my mum, my sisters and my friends, who I would regularly catch up with either going out shopping or for lunch, dinner and a chat. I miss going away camping for weekends which has not been possible since March this year. We have missed birthday dinners, mothers day and now fathers day catch ups. I know that this all sounds so selfish but I have only seen my youngest grandson who was born in April about 5 times and they only live about 20 minutes away from me. I know that lots of people don't see their families regularly, but I was not one of them and saw my boys regularly with them either popping into home or I would call in to see them.

    I miss my weekly therapy sessions sitting in the paddock hand feeding my pet alpacas who live at a friends property, telling them all about my day. During the last lock down when I was unable to visit them, my tamest alpaca Toby got sick and by the time I noticed when I could see him again it was too late and he died. Broke my heart as I had cried so much with that alpaca with his neck absorbing my tears during my most stressful times.

    I am not for one moment saying that this virus does not exist as I work at a hospital with a COVID ward, and work with the staff dealing with it every day. Sadly some people have passed away and for that I am sad, but they all were elderly and had co morbidities, and passed away possibly weeks earlier than they would have. The unfairness of their passing is the families left behind who can't even have a celebration of their lives or grieve with family and friends support. It would seem that the majority of the deaths attributed to COVID-19 is people passing away with the virus, not caused by the virus. I know that this virus can be extremely nasty as I also know of people who have contracted the virus who are under 60 and been extremely sick and debilitated.

    Due to the virus I no longer have lunch or breaks with my work colleagues. I am in an office on my own with minimal contact with others. A large majority of our staff are working from home with most of the remaining staff as sad and depressed as I am.

    We are not going to eliminate this virus, but will have to learn to live with it. We need to absolutely protect our vulnerable loved ones, but we also need to allow people to have a life that they choose to live. Implementing safe workplaces would be a good thing providing clean environments, hand wash and sanitiser and social distancing to keep people safe to the best of our abilities. Having hand sanitiser available at work places and shop entrances and even making people wear face masks in crowded shopping areas may be the new normal. Some of us need to be able to have some form of freedom and be able to see our families and friends, this is so necessary for the mental health of so many people.

    Sorry for the bad grammar or spelling just needed to rant :cry
  2. Kiwirich

    Kiwirich Been here awhile Supporter

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    Hey @Canary
    This is the exactly right place to come for a vent.
    Do some more if it'll help.
    These are difficult times for us all.
    This is where Real people check in and get support from other Real people when they need it.

    Kiwirich
  3. a2zworks

    a2zworks Trust me, I'm Pablo

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    Sorry to hear your pain Canary.
    I have no idea what it’s like to miss people or animals that much or any at all, never have been close to anyone, I think it comes from my upbringing always being told to shut up, to stop and to go away so I suppose I leaned to be on my own and built a barrier, don’t have close friends, don’t know any different.
    I am trying really hard with my teenage kids to be with them but at this time in their lives they are trying to find their place in the world so try and give them the space and freedom that they need.

    Nice for you that you have close relationships with your family, friends and pets.
    Keep yourself busy and talking to us and them.
    Do you do FaceTime or similar on the computer?
    Hang in there soon you’ll be able to hug them.
  4. Ron50

    Ron50 Long timer

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    Look on the bright side: how quick and easy is it to organise a ride with all our mates? Plus no dust!
    Cruz and a2zworks like this.
  5. a2zworks

    a2zworks Trust me, I'm Pablo

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    Sure is, don’t know any different.
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  6. Canary

    Canary Long timer

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    Thanks for all your kind thoughts. :-) I know that it will end eventually, but it is hard to stay happy when the majority of Victorians followed the rules and due to the decisions made by others, we are being made to pay the price. Won't get all CSM but just sad. :(:

    A2zworks: I don't use face time or anything like that. Talk to family on the phone, but not the same as seeing them face to face. That is sad that you had such an upbringing, but lovely that you are making the effort with your kids. Teenagers are tricky at the best of times, but some are really struggling now, especially those that are currently in lock down. I think that sometimes when we don't have a happy childhood, we try to not repeat the same with our own children.

    Daughter in laws also in tears with the loneliness and the thought of not being able to see family, go out except for a walk around the block and being trapped at home with babies and toddlers until at this stage October the 26th if the cases fall below 5 new cases a day. One has a two and a half year old and is having her second in a few weeks. She is so tired and we cannot help her with the toddler who we used to mind along with her Mum.

    No organising rides with mates as we are not allowed over 5 kms from our homes if we are not going to work or medical appointments, or to get food. We won't be able to ride with friends until after 26th of October when we can go further than 5 kms from our homes. :2cry
    JohnG., a2zworks and Andrew2 like this.
  7. Paul124ac

    Paul124ac Long timer

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    Hey @Canary, feeling your pain. Sucks to be locked down and restricted, hard to not lash out and yell at those you feel are responsible, pent up anger is not good. I took the bike out on Friday and just roamed around in the local forests which made me feel 100% better, and I’ve had my daughters around today for lunch and a glass or two of red, but lately I’ve been hit with just punch after punch of shit news and it’s getting to me. A bloody good mates young bloke (16) has been diagnosed with incurable cancer, a childhood sweetheart and very good friend of my sisters passed away from cancer last week, and my uncle whom I adore has just been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Fuckity fuck fuck shit. There’s been other shit going on that I won’t bore anyone with. Life is a bastard. Don’t know how to dig my way out of this but I guess I will, I have a loving family and nothing to worry about financially or career wise, if it wasn’t for motorcycles I’d be a right miserable bastard.

    Chin up yeah? Keep posting, I know it helps me to have you bastards at my back. Next week I’ll win lotto and life can go have a shit one. I’ll keep thinking of this view:

    4A01BEE0-75B7-4BEF-BE3A-228F5B878EDC.jpeg
  8. Canary

    Canary Long timer

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    Wow, Paul you have certainly had some shit news lately which is awful.

    I know that I am also lucky to have a loving family and can look forward to the new arrival in a few weeks. :-)

    That is definitely a great view to be looking at and the more you can see it the better. :-)
    Kiwirich, a2zworks and Paul124ac like this.
  9. hunter_greyghost

    hunter_greyghost XS650 Allroads Traveller

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    Hey folks - hope we can look at this situation this time next year and have a good catch up in person [plus a few libations]
    My thoughts are with those less fortunate than me, Bev & I are now in Cowra - waiting for the legals to go through in a months time
    Dream house sold - anxiety easing - new life starting soon - sun is shining
    be safe people - love to all
    Cheers
    Baza
    Sfcootz, JohnG., Canary and 4 others like this.
  10. Ron50

    Ron50 Long timer

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    Thanks for the update, Baza. I was wondering what stage you were at today when I was in the area.
    hunter_greyghost likes this.
  11. hunter_greyghost

    hunter_greyghost XS650 Allroads Traveller

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    All good Ron
    Cheers
    Baza
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  12. JohnG.

    JohnG. Long timer

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    @Canary,

    Yes, all this restriction is grating on us too (although fortunately have a work 'bubble' either side of the Snowy mountains)
    Rallies are going to feel extra special after this, hopefully Cold Flame is the first cab of the rank... Holding that thought :ricky
  13. Paul124ac

    Paul124ac Long timer

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    Yeah, the travel thing might be interesting, a lot of people are going to “hit the wallaby” I reckon. There’s been a surge in secondhand and new caravan sales, a local mate who I buy my bits from has seen unprecedented interest, and just in my limited circle of mates 5 have bought bikes and luggage and are gearing up to travel. The few trips we did before the lockdown we were seeing towns full of people, great to see but the selfish loner in me cries for the times I would be the only bastard camped on the river. Oh well, might make some new friends.
  14. hunter_greyghost

    hunter_greyghost XS650 Allroads Traveller

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    Been a crazy time to sell and move but no major issues but that could be just luck too !
    Lots of strange goings on - had a nephew become a menace to my elderly parents, stand over tactics and basic elder abuse - called 000, had cops drive from Young [30mins away],
    no joy - little bastard pissed off by the time cops got there - did get a call from them afterwards - I will have to touch base with them now things have slowed a bit - have not done anything yet,
    any suggestions people - I have qualifications and should know - but because of my own issues can't remember a f...... thing !!
    I mow their lawns most weeks so keeping in touch - but can't be there 24/7 - now 90km away from them
    Dad is 93 this year and is battling Alzheimer's - still lucid mostly but does have his 'happy moments'
    Mum's 89 and neither need this shit in their lives [ I don't either but I'm being careful in approach]
    Stay Safe
    Baza
    Sfcootz likes this.
  15. Canary

    Canary Long timer

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    That's not good Baza.
    What kind of elder abuse?
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  16. Paul124ac

    Paul124ac Long timer

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    My sister and myself were accused of elder abuse when my father was in hospital, Alzheimer’s and cancer and we, including him, knew he wasn’t getting out unless in a box. We’d arranged for a lawyer to come in, tidy up his will, background- he’d remarried but his wife had pre-deceased him and he’d payed out her daughter from a previous marriage, in his condition he’d forgotten all that and was very adamant that his estate was going to his natural children and no one else. There was zero animosity from the daughter, we still keep in touch.

    Anyway, I let the hospital know as a courtesy, and all fucking hell broke loose. I don’t react well to 12 year old doctors telling me I was trying to strip my dying father of his last wishes. Shirtfronted him in the corridor and a very concise argument convinced him he’d got the wrong end of the pineapple, we ended up getting a coffee and the stories of what children do mentally to their siblings and physically and mentally to their dying parents abhorred me to say the least, he apologised for assuming that was the case with me, he’d figured myself and my sis were the blow-ins and there was a massive shit fight about to occur on his ward.

    When there’s money involved Baz it becomes bloody awful, and it doesn’t take much for people to get cunning and even violent. My father told me he wished he’d left us more, I tapped my head and showed him my two fists and said he’d given me brains and hands to work hard and carve my own way, unfortunately as I found out a nurse had reported that as threatening behaviour, sad indictment really on what is the norm in their workplace I guess.

    Suppose what I’m saying Baz is if the nephew is physically abusing then gloves are off, if he’s trying to milk the cow then that’s no better and he deserves what he gets but for Buddha’s sake mate get the whole story. Family wounds never heal.
  17. Canary

    Canary Long timer

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    Sadly it is not just family that abuse the elderly either emotionally, financially or physically. Lots of neighbours and friends also do this despite the families trying to stop it.
  18. hunter_greyghost

    hunter_greyghost XS650 Allroads Traveller

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    Mainly verbal intimidation and threats, making demands and using standover tactics - he's always hated mum because his mother [my adopted sister], never got on with mum,
    complicated situation with both his mother and brother having passed away in the last few years, he has cut himself off from the family up until now,
    turned up @ 2100hr on a Saturday night, and demanded that he leave a car in the family garage - verbally abused mum [89] to the point she rang me - frightened and in tears,
    I told her to ring OOO [Police] as I was 60km away and had a few ports under the belt, I also rang OOO and explained the situation, by the time Police arrived [50km away @ Young]
    the little prick had pissed off - Police couldn't do anything because there was no damage etc, and I guess mum wouldn't want lay charges - so it's very frustrating hence my ranting
    I did get a return call from the cops who attended, they basically said there wasn't anything they could do - will pursue avenues - stay tuned
    Cheers
    Baza
  19. Cruz

    Cruz Lost but laughing.

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    And yet we can still get into arguments with ourselves.
  20. Paul124ac

    Paul124ac Long timer

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    That’s shit Baz, and exactly what I mean about family wounds never healing. Rifts can go on for generations.
    hunter_greyghost likes this.